lirik lagu parliament of fools – wtfm (intro)
[radio noise]
[news broadcast: reporter johnson, mooses column, ]
h~llo every~!
~come back from the break everyone, i’m~
~johnson, coming to you live from w~
~t~
~oy band sensation parliament of fools will reportedly be receiving their court verdict in the coming~
~are minutes away from knowing the jury’s verdict in the ongoing case against the fools following the assault allegations pledged against them in early~
~en tishkoff reportedly engaged in a bar brawl which left several injured and~
~the owner even going on record to say that the damage done to the location is ~
~disproved by multiple record low bac tests~
how does that even happen?!?
the band was released on bail later that night, using the profits from their newly released album to stay out of jail until late august~
~suddenly stopped paying, citing spotify revenue splits as the~
~of options and with nowhere left to turn, the fools would then rush to release their “summer single~”
~clearly a desperate attempt to get enough money to pay bail, however~
~backfired again after the bizarre decision to include rather incriminating audio recordings from the night of the alleged crime in the form of a chorus~
~held in jail ever since. the trial has been ongoing since october 27th and progressed at a snail’s pace due to the lack of cooperation from the defe~
hold on, they’re announcing the verdict! give us a second to tune y’all in!
[trial recording: judge oliver, charlie, ]
~sighs~ here we go
objection your honor, hearsay
that’s not applicable here mr. hartenstein
overruled your honor
~sighs~ you’re unbelievably lucky i’m too tired to deal with you four right now, because if i had half a mind i’d hold all of you in contempt until the day i~
~shuffles papers.~ mr. waugh, the jury has found you and your compatriots guilty. you’ve been sentenced to…(unintelligible). you will be assigned to…
um, objection again your honor, we actually plead insanity
you know what?! f~ck it! i’m assigning you four to christian st. peter psychiatric hospital, and you will stay there until you’re ready to act like f~cking adults! never, in my 47 years of practice have i ever seen something like this! you four are the most ill~mannered, narcissistic, disrespectful defendants i have ever had the displeasure of working with! i mean, i wouldn’t be surprised if the raccoon looking one f~cked ducks in his free time, that’s just the kind of little weasels you four~!
[news broadcast: reporter johnson]
holy..! well you heard it here first folks, the fools are~
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