lirik lagu jaurim – dear mother
[translated]
mother, forgive me
this is my sincere heart
all i’ve ever wanted was for you to understand me
like you’ve always said
living life really is not easy
i feel like one day it will all suddenly stop at a street corner
mother, what should i do?
where do i need to go now?
even though i roam around aimlessly with heavy feet
i have nowhere to put my heart
i had nothing to be afraid of, i had nothing to lose
there was no longer anything in my way to stop me
driven crazy by fiery anger, driven crazy by violent grief
i tried to destroy everything
i tried so hard to become a good child, just like you wanted
but that wasn’t enough to satisfy you
you told me, who was still young, that my life was a failure, that it was over
why did you push me into such a small pit
when is this world such a beautiful place?
did you want me to live with my eyes closed, ears blocked, mouth closed as if i was dead?
were you not able to love me as i was, the me who was lacking?
why am i not good enough?
why did you hate me?
why did you bring me into this world?
mother, my wicked heart, and cowardly weakness
is all because, when i needed you the most, you threw me away
mother, don’t make me cry again
right now i only have you left
though my feet are heavy, (you are) the place i will return to
now, i beg you to hold me in your arms
[original lyric]
엄마 저를 용서하세요
이 마음은 진심이에요
언제나 당신만은 나를
이해해 주기를 바라 왔어요
당신이 늘 얘기했듯이
인생은 참 쉽지 않네요
어느 날 길모퉁이에서
문득 멈춰버릴 것만 같아요
엄마, 난 어쩌면 좋아요?
이제는 어디로 가야 하나요?
무거운 발걸음으로
하릴없이 거리를 헤매 봐도
이 마음 둘 곳이 없어요
두려운 게 없었지
잃을 것도 없었어
더 이상 날 말리는 이도 없었지
뜨거운 분노에 미쳐
거센 슬픔에 미쳐
모든 것을 부숴 버리려 했지
당신의 바람대로 착한 아이가 되려고
무던히도 애를 썼지만
당신에겐 그걸로 충분하지가 않았고
아직 어린 나의 인생을
실패다, 끝났다 했지
세상은 이렇게 아름다운데
왜 나를 그런 작은
구덩이에 밀어 넣었나요?
눈 감은 채, 귀 막은 채
입 닫은 채
마치 죽은 체 살기 바란 건가요?
이대로의 나를, 모자란 나를
사랑해 주면 안 됐나요?
왜 나론 안 되나요?
왜 내가 미웠나요?
왜 나를 낳았나요?
엄마, 저의 악한 마음과
비겁한 나약함은 모두
당신이 가장 필요했던
그 때 버림받았기 때문이에요
엄마, 날 또 울리지 말아요
지금 내겐 당신뿐이에요
무거운 발걸음으로
그래도 내가 돌아갈 곳
이제는 제발 나를 안아 주세요
translated by: jinny for lyricalmovement.wordpress.com
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