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lirik lagu vect - mental stress 2 (revenge of malaise)

13. mental stress 2 (revenge of malaise)

my mind is a prison of uncontrollable terror & discomfort
all i do is try to break out of the cell for freedom & i can’t

buried away cast out & ashamed
reclusive, not afraid just away i need to stay
hating myself & others now with every day
feeling like i got nothing more to say
i got more to speak, i just don’t wanna repeat
i fought this once & i overcame
now it’s back to do far worse than kick me in the face
she’s in my dreams again taunting me moaning my name
what does she want me from me? i’m not all that sure
try to overdosе so it all becomes a blur
having nightmares of our timеs of what we were
so sick in the head for her there isn’t a cure
i had everything i needed but now it’s all gone
blaming myself for all that went wrong
i lost control like a drunk driver
i fought it all that i could because i’m too much of a fighter

(chorus)
help me! i cannot breathe!
this mental stress is f~cking me
tell me what i do not see!
if you don’t truly get it better keep away from me
my friends are scared to be near me, they wanna have committed
i know they all fear me, but they won’t admit it
i can’t kick it with them without having a panic attack
a.d.d. & o.c.d. is a brutal habitat
don’t wanna be around a soul. i lock myself in my home
crying mass amounts of tears & smashed my phone
too neurotic & petulant, ever so prevalent
seems like my sanity is only tentative
holding my head in despair as i consume my medicine
my homies knocking on my door, i don’t wanna let ’em in
playing with a wolf it ain’t safe, they better get
haven’t picked myself up for days to shower or shave
it’s hard to give a d~mn on things
i know the truth, keep away the debate you’re handing me
then i lay my head back & fall to the floor
blood starts to run but i care no more

(chorus)

this turmoil won’t stop its lesson popping’ anti psychotics anti~depressants
i can’t feel my shade of 111
n0body can help me ’cause barely any will
n0body can help me ’cause it’s them i might k!ll
strobe light in my face as i fall asleep to music so cryptic
vigilant to the point of narcissistic
downing all these bullets with alcoholic drinks
waking up with anxiety making my body freeze
my savior has fallen like a body that drowned
a broken crown is holding down every reason to believe
& now i’m down & i bleed; i’ve burned & learned that it’s no longer worth the time of my hurt
stressed the f~ck out, damaging everything i see around
neighbors call the cops from me breaking everything down
got my kitana in my hand when they enter the house
they find me curled in a corner not making a sound
(chorus)

is this ever gonna away….?
no, this is never gonna go away….

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