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lirik lagu tyze nitro - fear

[produced by tyze nitro]

[verse 1: tyze nitro]
been to north greater london and back and i still survived with battle scars on my mental and trauma burned directly in my eyes
upbringing poor in 2k 1 to the 9
prayers that i will be fine
some memories were happy like laughter and also the school bus rides on the 460 route
fixations on music got me wanting to do it
had some screws in my head crawling away
hammer in my hand, i might as well use it
losing loads cause first it was my old house then my mother then my mind i was starting to be losing
9 years old and i lost the ability to smile
i can’t remember i how do it
trauma got me f~cked
it changed the way i act
been looking for happiness for ages, i only get happy by looking back in the past
they say never look back i do the opposite
my life in apocalypse anyways
it saved me but broke me
i still miss my mother
i ain’t seen her ever since

[hook]
have worries in my sleep of how i’m gonna be when i’m older
have these worries that make me sick, feels like i’m carrying boulders
asking the lord to gimme hope
i ain’t been to church ever since i left my mums house
i never make songs like this cuz i’d take too many takes cause you’d hear me choke
[verse 2]
my dad died when i just got fostered
i had my eyes flooding with tears like balham in the blitz, felt like this pain was never stopping
even i never knew much more bout my dad, it had me feeling like sh~t
got a n~gga more even lumpier than a bowl of porridge
these metaphors can’t express how i down i was can i be honest?
i can’t find my way, surrounded by bad sh~t all in a forest
every time these thoughts come haunt me
the trees get bigger and i’m just rotting
suffering in silence, no one understood my screams
we’re they foreign? or not
the pain hurts a lot
3 attempted suicides, on my name, that’s all i got
i exchange my pain with my siblings
witnessing my beginnings, put them on my album cover
right by that white council building that we all used to live in

[hook]
have this grief stuck in my mental because it’s breaking me
have these sorrows in my head, i don’t think it’s escaping me
hope that these scars will heal
drown it with holy water i will
and will i ever see happiness again and will it really be real?

- lirik lagu tyze nitro

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