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lirik lagu tom chapin - how i became a clown

first grade wasn’t too exciting
i was seeking something new to do
so i ran away and joined the circus
when the circus train came through

but when i went to meet the old ringmaster
i tripped on my shoelace and ~ splat! ~ fell down
the old man said, “enough! that’s very funny stuff!”
and that’s how i became a clown
i put on baggy pants and shoes that were too big
a red nose and a very orange wig
and every night we piled into the clown car
ready to begin the ~~
“ladies and gentlemen, here come the clowns
spreading silliness across all three rings
honking and bonking and doing clowny things!”

then pushnikov, the smallest of the russian tumblers
he fell off his family and broke his crown
the old man said, “hey kid, climb up that pyramid!”
and that’s how i became an acrobatic clown

i put on russian tights, and slippers and a sash
a headband and a pencil~thin mustache
and i clambored up a stack of strong men
ready to begin the ~~
“and now in the center ring
the great pushnikov will juggle bowling b~lls
a chainsaw and a sled
balanced high atop his brothers on his head!”
one day the sword~swallower got indigestion
found himself unable to keep it down
the boss was up a tree, until he looked at me
and that’s how i became a sword~swallowing
acrobatic clown

i wiped the broad sword clean
and took a last deep breath
sure that i was facing certain death
closed my eyes and opened up my mouth
unready to begin the ~~
“and now the great gulpini
will hold you in his thrall
as he swallows king arthur’s sword
excalibur, as long as he is tall!”

then the liontamer and the bearded lady
ran off and got married in allentown
they shoved me out on stage
they opened up the cage
and that’s how i became a bearded, liontaming
sword~swallowing, acrobatic clown

they lit the fiery hoops. i cracked my nine~foot whip
picked up a chair and told them, “let ‘er rip!”
there were lions, tigers, bounding all around me
ready to begin the ~~
“okay, circus goers
here come the big cats with their mighty claws!
watch the liontamer place his head
inside their jaws!”
and then one night the double~dealing ticket taker
took the ticket money and then skipped town
the boss said
“this is bad! who here knows how to add?”
and that’s how i became a bookkeeping, bearded
liontaming, sword~swallowing, acrobatic clown

then one day the elephant cleaner~upper
left show biz forever, laid his shovel down
the old man caught my eye. i said, “don’t even try!”
that very night the circus train
chugged back into my town

so i left the big top and the ring
and bid my circus friends a fond farewell
that is why i have so much to share
with you today in show~and~tell

teacher: tommy, what did you do on your vacation?
i was a bookkeeping, bearded, liontaming
sword~swallowing, acrobatic clown

- lirik lagu tom chapin

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