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lirik lagu tmm_real_ - morningstar confessional: habitual

[intro (spoken dialogue)]
father
my child
i have some…things i need to confess, get off my chest
well then, my child. let’s begin, shall we?

[verse]
dear father, i’ve sinned for my whole life
i feel that it may be too late to start clean and do right
i’m begging for forgiveness so would just stop and listen
i’ve sinned since i was born pay attention to what i’m listin’

i’ve never been a man of god not something i believed in
don’t know what i believe and i know that i should be leavin’
science seemed too specific and others jus seemed to fake
but listen cause i’m not done that’s not even the worst thing

i lied about it, lied for the people that’s just like you
i pray for them every night not knowin’ who i’m prayin’ to
i’ve never believed in god yet i wore him around my wrist
i wish i could cry for this but i can’t seem to form a mist

i’m a sinner so even if i fight for what is right
i’ll go out while crashing out and i’ll die in a gunfight
dear father, i’ve always been kind of a hypers~xual
i never really loved so i always looked for the sensuals
dear father, i’ve always clenched my fist in all scenarios
i’ve held it back but always let my anger out on stereos

it’s tough luck, running from people who don’t exist
dear father, i’ve always been kind of an egotist
i’ve worked for who i am but i’m always told to be humble
when i love myself i’m told to just keep it down to a mumble

dear father, i’m trying to clean up and start again
so pump me with medicine and make me take it back to pretend
so take your sword and stab me through the heart in the streetlight
leave the stick and run as i lie dead in the sunlight

they hate for my image they hate me for what they see
only thing that i ask is at least hate me for me

so give me pity father for this isn’t all my fault
my father he was a f~ggot to him where i pin this all
beating women and throwing lovely ladies down the stairwell
he beat me and he didn’t even bother using his belt

a skinny little twig acting like he was raised like that
unfunded roads and playgrounds cause i resonate with that
i make sure my friends are happy because i concern with that
i image myself with power angelic i yearn for that
acne ridden face slow as h~ll try to keep up pace
catching up but i lose the race everybody just seems to fake
but that’s cope i envy because they are far in line
but also they ain’t they’re children i guess i just lost the time

dear father, when did i surround myself with leeches
hateful little sh~ts who think they still abide by preaches
they hate anyone who doesn’t like women if they’re a male
they hate anyone whos g~y which is why no one knows my tale

dear father, i fear the unknown yet i still believe it
delusion kicking in panic sets and yet i still read it
i live for the ones who love me including the eyes of mine
yet i have friends don’t follow those rules they cut they time

they never want to listen they never want to believe
they really do mean a thing at least be alive just for me
i fear the day that i get sent another note again
cause i fear that day the note won’t be written ink of a pen

[outro (spoken dialogue)]
~panting~
forgive me father, but i…i have to leave. have a good day

farewell, morningstar

- lirik lagu tmm_real_

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