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lirik lagu theatre's kiss - self flagellation

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experienced violence
affecting my mental health
the persistent urge
to numb or even shut off emotions, in vain
urge is like a punishment

the question is, is this normal?
normal to have such thoughts?
i feel guilty, even though it feels good
sticking to my body
bodily fluids
naughty boy
watched and punished for eternity
still, desire is stronger
to know
to explore
and accept myself

curiosity
is blasphemy

as long as i remain here
i’ll continue to cum blood
not by choice
deliverance still buried in repression


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