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lirik lagu the narcissist cookbook - maybe, when you see me next

i’m not afraid of you
but i’m a little bit afraid
of the way you make me feel
like you could take it all away

see, there’s this part of me
that won’t be comfortable at all
until i have nothing

because you can’t lose nothing
nothing only grows
it thrives in arid landscapes
and it flourishes in places no one goes

i mean, what’s the difference between
the flowers that i tend to
and the weeds i’m poisoning?

and i’ve been making plans
to get out on my own again
cashing out my savings
gradually making enemies of friends

picking at my strands
trying to unwind myself
by tugging at the threads
maybe, when you see mе next
i’ll be someonе different
new bones in old skin

maybe, when you see me next
i’ll be someone different

i’m not afraid of change
no one really is
we don’t mean it when we say it
when the alternative is staying
where the bad sh~t is
where the shadows kiss
where the monsters live

where the antonym of dying is surviving
and i don’t believe it is

my life can’t just be a series of vignettes
about a girl who got away
who broke their grip
who kicked and gouged and spit
just to slip and do it all again

so i’ve been making plans
to let this little place of mine
burning all my credit
staying up all weekend
scanning for cheap flights
i’ve been reading palms
and i’m not a fan of the way
my sun and fate lines intersect

but maybe, when you see me next
i’ll be someone different
new heart and new head

maybe, when you see me next
i’ll be someone different

- lirik lagu the narcissist cookbook

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