lirik lagu the dream team (official) - screw the catholic church
[intro: lance ito and martin luther]
right about now, dream team court is in full effect
judge lance a. ito presiding
in the case of martin luther vs. the catholic church
prosecuting attorneys are: martin luther, john calvin, and king henry the goddang eighth
order, order, order
martin luther, take the freaking stand
do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth
and nothin’ but the truth so help your protestant b-tt?
“you god dang right!”
well, won’t you tell everybody what the heck you gotta say?
[verse 1: martin luther]
screw the catholic church comin’ straight from germany
if we don’t stop them it’ll last for eternity
and not the protestants so the church thinks
they have the authority to k!ll a minority
screw that cr-p, ’cause i ain’t the one
for a punk catholic priest with god and his son
to be beatin’ on, and thrown in jail
we can go toe to toe in the middle of a cell
messing with me ’cause i’m a protestant man
got an idea, a reformation is my plan
searchin’ my house, lookin’ for proof of heresy
cause everyone in the church has never been a clerisy
you’d rather see, me on a cross
than having religious freedom spread all across
beat a priest out of shape
and when i’m finished, bring the bible on a plate
to make him swallow his words so he can break his fast
looking at protestants like they are outcasts
i don’t know if they greedy or what
charging indulgences so they can buy some donuts
and on the other hand, without people’s trust, they don’t got none
but don’t let them fool you, they don’t know son
’cause they’ll slam ya down to the street top
dumb stupid priests trynna wipe our blood with a mop
martin luther will drop you first
knock you out harder than i knocked out this verse
just cause you want some money
your priests are fools and you think this is funny
changing indulgences and working hard every day
and when i’m finished, we will never have to pay
the church is done, time to say goodbye
i really hate the church, here’s 95 reasons why
[chorus]
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
[intro 2: martin luther]
john calvin, will you please give your testimony to the jury about this messed up incident?
[verse 2: john calvin]
screw the catholic church and i said it with authority
because the protestants on the street is a majority
calvinists are with whoever i’m steppin’
and predestination is our message
a crime of heresy, for the so-called law
wishin’ jesus was a dude that they all saw
riots start forming behind me
but they’re scared of my religion so they punch me to blind me
but that doesn’t ever work, i just laugh
because it gives ’em a hint, not to step in my path
for the church, i’m saying, “god isn’t real!”
but the church isn’t a group that i have to appeal
pullin’ out a silly cross, so you stand
with a fake costume and a bible in your hand
but let us read the bible so we can see what’s up
and you will lose your followers and they’ll mess you up
make you think i’ ma stay down quietly
but you better worry calvin’ll end you all violently
you’re probably destined for h-ll in your afterlife
but i’m a celebrate now and play my fife
beat up any priest that sweats me
or any heretic, that threatens me
i’m a reformer with a h-ll of a view
takin’ out some priests, they don’t know what to do
i’m a goddang revolter that’s mad
with potential to do some bad
so i’ma turn it around
focus on my own religion
after we’re done the church will be cr-pped on by pigeons
yeah, somethin’ like that
but it all depends on the size of your brains
y’all are losers at the end of the day
no more arguments i just got something to say
[chorus]
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
[intro 3: martin luther]
king henry won’t you step up to the stand
and tell the jury how you feel about this bullcr-p
[verse 3: king henry viii]
i’m tired of the motherfrickin’ jackin’
sweatin’ my gang, while i’m chillin’ in the castle, and
stealin my freedom, and for what?
maybe it’s because i kick so much b-tt
i kick wives, or maybe ’cause i want them to die
cutting on the floor cuz i don’t want them no more
but the church won’t let me do this
‘i want divorce thats my only wish
they put out my picture with silence
’cause my ident-ty by itself causes violence
the king with the criminal behavior
yeah, i’m a gangsta, but still i got flavor
without religious power, what do ya got?
a sucker in a uniform waitin’ to get shot
by me or another king
and with the money i receive you can here me say cha ching
(the catholics ain’t nothing, he’ll make is own church fool)
and as you all know, he’s here to rule
whenever i’m rollin’, keep lookin’ in the mirror
cause anglicanism, is get nearer and nearer
dumb, stupid priest with a cross
when it comes to ruling people, i’m the boss
that i take out, and then get away
i’m riding on my horse laughin this is what i’ll say
[chorus]
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
screw the catholic church
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