lirik lagu the boot scootin' sissies - grindr on my garmin
[verse 1]
cell towers don’t reach where i’m haunting
but that don’t mean i can’t find some meat
got my garment plugged in, satellite singin’
guidin’ strangers to my backwood retreat
at&t might left me stranded, but my gps still finds me a man
down where the creek bends and coverage ends
i’m gettin’ serviced in ways verizon can’t
[chorus]
got grindr on my garment, navigation to penetration
no bars, no apps, just barnyard sin
gettin’ raw where the fences end
pulled off the road, unzipped my with a grin
now i’m gettin’ read by a boy in wranglers again
[verse 2]
matched a lumberjack past miler’s farm
plugged in the route to his southern charm
said he splits logs, but splits more cheeks
but the real big blade’s in his denim sheath
met by the creek where the cattails sway
garment lit up, said “you found foreplay”
he came five times ‘fore he let me breathe
now my truck leans left and my shocks still grieve
[chorus]
got grindr on my garment, navigation to penetration
no bars, no maps, no time to chft
just a lifted truck and a cowboy hat
he pulled me close by the hitchin’ post
and filled me up more than southern sunday toast
got grindr on my garment, signal’s dead but i’m fully charged
[bridge]
sunday mornin’, i’m sore to pews
pastor preachin’ ’bout the straight and narrow path
if he knew what my garment’s been routin’ me to
he’d say “my soul needs a holy gps bath”
but come midnight, i’m back to renavigatin’
route me, daddy, to that next country boy
my four~wheel drive ain’t the only thing
it’s built for rough terrain and noisy joy
[chorus]
got grindr on my garment, navigation to penetration
no bars, no grace, just backseat prayer
he laid me out like a foldin’ chair
we blew out shocks on the county line
now my truck hums low and my hole hums fine
got grindr on my garment, navigation to penetration
and jesus better check my route history
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