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lirik lagu roderick porter - xxx

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[verse 1]
i just been so wide awake
i cannot take
the pain that i feel in my heart
i never know how to cope
hide it with dope
you were a part of my art
i still don’t know how to feel
i will not heal
tell me this sh-t isn’t real
i still don’t know how to feel
i will not heal
tell me this sh-t isn’t real
i just been so wide awake
i cannot take
the pain that i feel in my heart
i never know how to cope
hide it with dope
you were a part of my art
i still don’t know how to feel
i will not heal
tell me this sh-t isn’t real
i still don’t know how to feel
i will not heal
tell me this sh-t isn’t real…

[spoken]
x inspired me a lot and…helped me through some really f-cked up, terrible times. and he’s the reason a lot of my music even exists today

[verse 2]
you helped me numb my depression
if only for seconds
it meant the world inside my eyes
let’s just pretend we were numb
snow on repeat
(he?) said “i wanted to die”
b-mpin, you’re thinkin too much
( i don’t know what he’s saying here)
sit at my desk with la croix
you were my beacon of light
darkness at nights
you helped to keep me alive
all of this happened too fast
part of me p-ssed
i won’t pretend i’m okay
hurtin cause we’ll never meet
feelin defeat
sh-t that i wanted to say
you became part of my life
i was so stressed
you showed me how to express
quick when a bullet gets shot
everything stops
nothing as final as death

nothing as final as death…

rest in peace

[outro]
i just been so wide awake
i cannot take
the pain that i feel in my heart
i never know how to cope
hide it with dope
you were a part of my art
i still don’t know how to feel
i will not heal
tell me this sh-t isn’t real
i still don’t know how to feel
i will not heal
tell me this sh-t isn’t real…

i just been so wide awake
i cannot take
the pain that i feel in my heart
i never know how to cope
hide it with dope
you were a part of my art
i still don’t know how to feel
i will not heal
tell me this sh-t isn’t real
i still don’t know how to feel
i will not heal
tell me this sh-t isn’t real


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