
lirik lagu riki lindhome - hysteria
[intro]
there once was an affliction that just affected women
a mysterious disease called hysteria
it was when women had opinions or moods or needs
or anything in that awful area
[verse 1]
in 400 b.c. hippocrates
yeah that guy whose oath we still use, said
it was caused by a wandering uterus
that moved through your body and made you a b~tch
[verse 2]
in the middle ages they said
our wombs were possessed by demons
but you could get rid of those evil spirits by sneezing
achoo!
and if not
you were a witch
makes sense
[verse 3]
in the 1800s, they discovered something brand new
only a psychiatrist was qualified to do
they massaged your v~g~n~ ’til you shook
that’s the cure
they called it paroxysm and said it wasn’t s~xual
the women were probably like
“uhh. sure!”
[verse 4]
therapy today is expensive and taxing
not having to work on yourself sounds relaxing
instead of evolving and changing your ways
you go to the doctor
they make you come and
then your husband pays!
[chorus]
i wanna be a hysterical woman in the 1880s
therapy wise it was the best time for the ladies
i don’t want introspection
i don’t wanna grow
if i have an inner child, i don’t wanna know
i don’t wanna ~n~lyze all my pain
i just want to ~rg~sm and free cocaine
[post~chorus]
all you had to do was say something crazy like
“i wanna wear pants.”
and a doctor’d be like
“get this woman off, stat.”
i don’t understand why we stopped doing that
[bridge]
sure not everything in the 1880s was great
but i’d rather be traded in a land deal by my dad
than go on another tinder date
and, sure, communication was at a slower pace
but i’d rather have that
than to have anyone in the world be able to tell me what they hate about my face
but in the 1880s, you’d be
drunk by noon, no one would know
just like the pandemic without the sourdough
if i was there i’d find a way
to get treated for hysteria every day
[chorus]
i wanna be a hysterical woman in the 1880s
therapy wise it was the best time for the ladies
i don’t wanna process
i don’t wanna try
if my relationships are toxic, please don’t tell me why
i don’t wanna journal about my dreams
i just want to ~rg~sm and drink amphetamines
[post~chorus]
all you had to do was say something crazy like
“listen to me.”
and a doctor’d be like
“finger this impertinent sow.”
that sounds so much better than what we have now
[bridge]
and it wasn’t taboo
everyone had hysteria
just like how now we have adhd
and everyone you’ve ever dated
has a clinically disorder personality
it’s not that we were normal human being with emotions
that’s not on the list
just like how there’s no way that person just didn’t want to date you
they must be a gaslighting, dark triad, on the spectrum, psychopathic, narcissist
who also has adhd
just like you and me
[chorus]
i wanna be a hysterical woman in the 1880s
therapy wise it was the best time for the ladies
i don’t wanna be a brand new me
i don’t wanna take accountability
if my subconscious tries to sabotage me, i’m just gonna let her
all i wanna do is have a paroxysm and yeah, yeah, yeah!
i’m better
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