lirik lagu randy kaplan - no nothing
[chorus]
no, nothin’, no, nothin’
i know nothin’ and you know nothin’
they know nothin’ and we know nothin’
no, nothin’ at all
[verse 1]
i got two pet cats at home
one of them’s name is m~ffin
m~ffin is a really, really good cat
she just sits in the windowsill all day long
soaking up the sun and purring like this:
pththththththth
when she l!cks your finger
it feels like sandpaper
yeah, she’s the archetypal cat
but i got another cat
and his name is nothing
it’s not that he doesn’t have a name
it’s spelled n~o~t~h~i~n~g
sometimes i spell it n~o~t~h~i~n
then i add an apostrophe
[chorus]
no, nothin’, no, nothin’
i know nothin’ and you know nothin’
they know nothin’ and we know nothin’
no, nothin’ at all
[verse 2]
now as i said m~ffin is pretty well behaved
but nothing, man, he’s totally dеpraved
the other day i camе home
and he was climbing halfway up my window curtain
and he was reaching out with his paw
and his claw was treacherously close
to the chagall lithograph i inherited from my grandma
and when i saw his paw and his claw i said, “no!”
[chorus]
no, nothin’, no, nothin’
i know nothin’ and you know nothin’
they know nothin’ and we know nothin’
no, nothin’ at all
[verse 3]
i also got a pet monkey at home
and his name is kqxhc
that’s spelled k~q~x~h~c
he was raised by ducks
his mama was a duck
and his papa was a duck
it came time to raise him
all they could come up with was kqxhc
now he’s come to live with me
well that’s another story, entirely
suffice it to say that kqxhc
is a very, very, very, very hungry monkey
the other day kqxhc woke up and he said, “aah~aah ooh~ooh aah, i want a m~ffin”
i said, “what? you wanna eat the cat?
now, we got rules against things like that here”
and kqxhc said, “i~i~i didn’t mean m~ffin the cat
i~i~i~i meant like a bran m~ffin or maybe a corn m~ffin, or
or even a blue~ooh~ooh~ooh~ooh~ooh~oohberry m~ffin”
i said, “what do you think this is, m~ffin delight?
we don’t just got all varieties of m~ffins sittin’ around for the taking”
so kqxhc said, “w~well whaddya got in the fridge?”
and i opened it, and you know what was in there?
a box of baking soda left over from the previous tenant
and an old crusty bottle of ketchup, some soy sauce and hot mustard and a few duck sauces
well the sight of this duck sauce upset kqxhc
and he said, “w~w~what’s with the duck sauce?
hey, w~where are my folks anyway?”
and i said, “no, no, kqxhc, it’s not like that at all
you see, the duck sauce is just from the chinese place that we get stuff delivered from all the time
i tell ’em not to gimme sauce, i said i don’t really use it
but they don’t understand and they keep sendin’ more sauce over here
and i feel bad throwing it away, i don’t want to waste food!
so it just keeps pilin’ up in the fridge
it has nothin’ to do with ducks at all!”
kqxhc wasn’t buyin’ it, and he said
“ooh~i~i’m not hungry, i think i lost my appeti~i
i~i’ll just have nothing”
and i said, “what?!
you’re not even hungry
and, and now you want to eat nothing, my other cat?
look, just ’cause he’s kinda depraved
and not as well behaved as m~ffin
doesn’t mean you can eat him!”
and kqxhc said, “aah~aah~ooh n~n~no, i didn’t mean nothing the cat
i~i~i~i meant
n~nothin’ at all!”
[chorus]
no, nothin’, no, nothin’
i know nothin’ and you know nothin’
they know nothin’ and we know nothin’
no, nothin’ at all
no, nothin’, nah~nah~nah~no nothin’
and you nah~nah~nah~nam~ma~nam~ma~know nothin’
and he know nothin’ and she know nothin’
no, nothin’ at all
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