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lirik lagu project_pears - i forgot what my dream was even about

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i’ve lost myself, completely forgot
the reason that i waste my time
caught in a trance of future stardom madness
forgetting the pain in my lines i express
only wanting to see my numbers growing
but the only fans that i have are promotion accounts
spreading my demonic wings, seething from jealousy only looking to murder
my own pride and love, slip into my coffin; let it be buried alive
slowly denying myself, just to serve the invisible crowd
that i’ve formed in my own head
they don’t even f~cking like it

and when i stop seeing this dream as
a mangled corporate entity that i must overcome
that’s when i see the light waiting for me
this success is determined by your own self

it’s determined by your own self
but i cannot convince myself
that the fans and the money will not do anything
to face the ego that is tearing my f~cking hair out
trying and trying to please the world is exhausting
waking up the next day feeling embarrassed of the last
gaining the apathy needed to feel something
contentment knowing that i at least enjoy it
doing it for my own self rather than the world
grinning as i slowly walk away
so f~ck this system and the people who would put me down
to place them above my own
and when i stop seeing this dream as
the reason for me to continue and carry on
that’s when i see a sunny brightened future
i think i have finally found myself
serving the invisible crowd that i have formed in my own head
they don’t even f~cking like it


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