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lirik lagu panda hikari - bitter medicine

[verse 1]:
i’m spittin out my bitter medicine, in desperate need of loads of sedatives
i feel irrelevant can’t speak it to my parents and
can’t even tell my friends
i text but they don’t answer, now i’m feeling hesitant
cuz i crashed out emotional overload
and when they spoke to me i felt like i was the foe
cuz it stung real deep, and still i cry
i explained myself but never got a d~mn reply
i guess my word don’t matter, i lеft they started chatter
including music homiеs they just might just prefer the latter
which is me out the picture… i guess i’ll go
i realize now which are the real ones though
cuz they hit me up they told me what was good
told me my emotions were valid and that i should
take some time away from the noise, not that i had a choice
cuz at the end of this all i know i’m so annoying

[verse 2]:
what if they do not like me? what if they all despise me?
what if my music homies don’t wanna write, with me
what if i’m not worth saving? what if i stop complaining?
don’t matter, can’t catch a break we’ll switch it up to maybe
put more stress in my soul, the hospital we go
my stepdad almost bought the farm cuz his kidneys though
they were at a 3 percent functionality rate
i felt like falling to my knees he’s in a bad state
i couldn’t lose him, i didn’t want to
he was part of my life despite lacking the blood to
be biologically related, my problems yes i hated
i could live through it all if i knew that he made it
and yes he did, but that’s not where it ends god d~mn
my blood father took a trip to f l a and then
got put into emergency too, my mind is f~cking through
i’m constantly panicking what can i f~cking do
[verse 3]:
i do not know, i’m worried, vulnerable and weak
crying in my pillow while i drown the f~cking screams
hitting up the homies they ignore me yeah it seems
that i’ll do this on my own, what’s new rinse and repeat
but my father made it out alright doing fine
thank god he is, i’m losing my d~mn mind
i laid in bed just hoping finally i’ll catch a break
until a vixen ass woman hit me up tryna hate
we used to date, long distance, her mind it changed
she came right back to me bringing back what she used to say
like using personal things i trusted her to know
that doesn’t matter to her if she is winning though
she couldn’t handle the loss told me to end my life
i wonder, who will miss me if i do that tonight
i can’t, that’s selfish sh~t ain’t how to settle it
i’ll suck it up swallowing my bitter medicine

swallowing my bitter medicine
swallowing my bitter medicine

- lirik lagu panda hikari

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