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lirik lagu original broadway cast of heathers - candy store

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heather chandler
are we gonna have a problem?
you got a bone to pick?
you’ve come so far
why now are
you pulling on my d~ck?
i’d normally slap your face off
and everyone here could watch ~
but i’m feeling nice
here’s some advice:
listen up, byatch

heather chandler with heathers duke and mcnamara
(variously)
i like looking hot;
buying stuff they cannot
i like drinking hard;
maxing dad’s credit card
i like skipping gym;
scaring her, scr~w~ng him
i like k!ller clothes;
kicking nerds in the nose!
if you lack the b~lls
you can go play dolls ~
have your mommy fix you a snack
whoa, whoa!
or you could come smoke
pound some rum and coke
in my porsche with the quarterback
oh, whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa!
honеy, what you waiting for?
all three heathers
step into my candy store!
time for you to provе you’re
not a loser anymore…
then step into my candy store!
guys fall

duke & mcnamara
at your feet

duke
buy you stuff!

mcnamara
help you cheat!

all three
all you

duke
have to do:

chandler
say goodbye to shamu

all three
that freak’s
mcnamara
not your friend
i can tell, in the end

all three
if she

duke
had your shot

all three
she would leave you to rot!

mcnamara
‘course if you don’t care
fine. go braid her hair ~
maybe “sesame street” is on

chandler & duke
whoa, whoa!

mcnamara
or forget that creep

duke
and get in my jeep…
chandler
let’s go tear up someone’s lawn!

duke & mcnamara
oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa!

all three
honey, what you waiting for?
welcome to my candy store!
you just gotta prove you’re
not a p~ssy anymore…
then step into my candy store!

(during the preceding, the heathers slip the note onto martha’s lunch tray. she opens it and reads it…)

chandler
you can join the team…

duke & mac
or you can b~tch and moan

chandler
you can live the dream…

duke & mac
or you can die alone

chandler
you can fly with eagles

duke & mac
or if you prefer

chandler
keep testing me

all three
and end up like her!

martha
veronica, look! ram invited me to his homecoming party! this proves he’s been thinking about me!

veronica
(lamely.) … color me stoked

martha
i’m so happy

heather duke
whoa, whoa, whoa ~
honey what you waiting for! ~

(chandler shoves duke aside)

heather chandler
shut up, heather
step into my candy store!
whoaaaaaaaaa!

duke & mac
oh, oh, oh
time for you
to prove
you’re not
a lame~ass
anymore!

all three
then step into my candy store!
it’s my candy store, it’s my candy. (x2)
it’s my candy store! (x2)


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