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lirik lagu nathan cox (comedian) & area of defect - a toast to joffrey

[verse 1: nathan cox]
whether it’s been 18 years since you read game of thrones
or just three seasons he’s been chilling your bones
only one character deserves your undivided hate
and now at long last he has met his fate
his wedding began and then his life stopped abrupt
for someone had the courage to put something in his cup
he dropped to the floor and clutched at his throat
it’s the best d~mn death that martin ever wrote

[chorus: kyle danger henick (area of defect), andy davison, both]
so everyone raise a glass
now this is a wedding we can celebrate
we’re rid of that pain in the ass
’cause there’s no worse person that i love to hate
no longer to wear the crown
give us daenerys or stannis instead
the world will sing out loud
at long last king joffrey is dead

[verse 2: kyle danger henick]
his bullsh~t started early, dooming mycah and lady
even king robert knew truly that little joffrey was shady (cat k!ller)
he could have given mercy instead of k!lling off ned (iced)
then he had sansa beaten, made her look at his head
at the siege of king’s landing, joffrey hid like a coward
he had the halfman out fighting while he hid up in his tower (halfman!)
what an assh0l~, incest born, twisted little brat
no wonder people loved it every time he got slapped
[chorus: kyle danger henick, andy davison, nathan cox, all]
so everyone raise a glass
now this is a wedding we can celebrate
we’re rid of that pain in the ass
’cause there’s no worse person that i love to hate
no longer to wear the crown
i’ll take tyrion as king, and jaime as hand (too soon?)
the world will sing out loud
at long last king joffrey is dead

[verse 3: nathan cox]
thought you were robert the second, more like aerys the third (mad king)
instead of joffrey the first, much better joffrey the t~rd
you don’t deserve sansa, you did not deserve ros (rest in peace)
but the way you got f~cked, i give a round of applause
now you can burn in seven h~lls as they ring the seven bells
hung in the towers up in baelor’s great sept
and now you hear us shout, let there be no doubt
the only happiness you brought was in death

[chorus: kyle danger henick & andy davison]
so everyone raise a glass
now this is a wedding we can celebrate
we’re rid of that pain in the ass
’cause there’s no worse person that i love to hate
no longer to wear the crown
how ’bout gendry or hot pie or lommy (what the f~ck’s a lommy?)
the world will sing out loud
at long last king joffrey is dead
[verse 4: the h31p (area of defect), nathan cox, andy davison, kyle danger henick & the h31p]
if you’d have just shown mercy, you’d have seen the same
you could have stopped the war, you could have stopped ilyn payne (pop, pop, pop)
instead of being a s~d~st, use an ounce of wisdom
now your name is cursed across all seven kingdoms
from oldtown to sunspear to pyke to flea bottom
every westerosi cheers because someone finally got him (h~lls yeah)
but in no place more than in winterfell’s embers
keep in mind lannisters, the north remembers!

[bridge: andy davison, kyle danger henick]
we all hoped this day would come
we just didn’t know how long we’d have to wait for the stranger to take him
now catelyn’s pain has become cersei’s, and her joy has turned to ashes in her mouth
the prince who lost his sword to a girl
the general who refused to fight
and the king who never really was
i’d have hodor rule rather than joffrey
he’d have twice the smarts and ten times the courage
all hail king hodor! hodor!

[chorus: the h31p, nathan cox, andy davison, kyle danger henick & the h31p]
so everyone raise a glass
now this is a wedding we can celebrate
we’re rid of that pain in the ass
’cause there’s no worse person that i love to hate
no longer to wear the crown
i guess we’re stuck with tommen (who the f~ck is tommen?)
the world will sing out loud
at long last king joffrey is dead

- lirik lagu nathan cox comedian area of defect

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