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lirik lagu n3xther - before my heart turns black

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i see you laughing, holding her hand
a love so perfect, i don’t stand a chance
i keep my distance, i play it cool
but deep inside, i’m just a fool

i tell myself i never cared
that i don’t need you
but every glance, every touch
hurts more than i can bear

so i lie to myself, say i’m better this way
that i never wished for you to stay
i pretend i don’t feel, i pretend i don’t see
but it’s k!lling the last bit of light left in me

i’m suffocating, the pain runs deep
lying to myself is the only way
the last defense to keep me here
before i lose myself to the fear

i tell myself i’ll find my turn
that someday someone will ease the burn
but every night, i fall asleep
with a love i’ll never earn

so i lie to myself, say i’m better this way
that i never wished for you to stay
i pretend i don’t feel, i pretend i don’t see
but it’s k!lling the last bit of light left in me
if i don’t admit it, maybe it won’t break me
if i close my eyes, maybe i won’t see
but the truth is crawling under my skin
how can i save my heart when it’s caving in?

so i lie to myself, say i’m better this way
that i never wished for you to stay
i pretend i don’t feel, i pretend i don’t see
but it’s k!lling the last bit of light left in me

i keep my heart locked, before it turns black
i run from the pain, never looking back
but no matter how much i try to hide
i can’t lie to myself tonight


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