lirik lagu moist cupcake entertainment - the harry potter rap
[verse 1]
yo~~~i’m ritchie coot, super cute and daft
and i welcome you to hogwarts school of wizardry and witchcraft
and i’m michael corner, kinda pudgy and dumb
we’re gonna tell you all about our wizard school, son
’cause hogwarts is the bomb, major school of magic
home to harry potter, whose life is so tragic
parents k!lled, forehead scarred, livin’ with fat muggles
man, voldemort gave potter some struggles to juggle
how do you get to hogwarts? don’t dare catch the short bus~~
get hogwarts express, platform nine~and~three~quarters
but first you gotta hit up the diagon alley
bring ya school list, check it twice, and ya dilly, don’t dally
we picked up galleons at thе goblin bank gringotts
to buy our magic sticks at ollivander’s wand shop
what’s inside your wand? some unicorn lubе
what you got in yours? a leprechaun’s p~b~ oh!
[chorus]
gryffindor, hufflepuff, ravenclaw, slytherin
drinkin’ pumpkin juice and gin
gryffindor, hufflepuff, ravenclaw, slytherin
let the harry potter rap begin
[verse 2]
the sorting hat, big~ass feast, dumbledore speaks
nearly~headless nick farted, every student they [?] freaked
we’re stuck in school and gotsta sign up for some classes
what you takin’? divination, with that chick with big glasses
i’m takin’ potions, with that douche professor snape
didn’t he get a dirty sanchez in screech’s s~x tape?
i read about that cr~p in last week’s daily prophet
oh that rita skeeter, i’d skeet in her moffit
skeeter wrote about hermione pumping viktor krum
down by hagrid’s hut? no, with his nimbus in her bum
oh that hermione queefed a quaffle whose clouds reeked so awful
it smelled up gryffindor common room like rotten greek falafel!
i heard ronald weasley was jealous as h~ll
dude, how’d he find out? by the odiferous smell
hermione’s fillin’ out, but cho chang is hotter
but who’s done ’em both? my man harry potter!
[chorus]
gryffindor, hufflepuff, ravenclaw, slytherin
drinkin’ pumpkin juice and gin
gryffindor, hufflepuff, ravenclaw, slytherin
let the harry potter rap begin
[interlude]
i am a demento~or
i work at azkaban
who likes bjs and has two thumbs?
that would be this guy (hey!)
[verse 3]
harry potter is the man, gryffindor’s top seeker
he wins more matches than reebok makes sneakers
on the quidditch pitch he catches snitches, leaving witches in stitches
teaching dumb b~tches to unhitch their twitchy tw~t itches
harry parked with pansy parkinson, he boned susan bones
snap, he’s the stone b~tch who makes moaning myrtle moan!
he got hog’s head on a knight bus ’til his cauldron was leaky
the chick started to mumble~~~he said “cho chang~y, no speak~y!”
did he do ‘er? sure did, but she must eat lots of chowder
her forbidden forest was so huge he used floo powder
the dementors snuck up on harry, they tried to de~soul him
he turned from cho chang and yelled “expecto patronum!”
so join us on his adventures, and grab your marauder’s map
expect more magical journeys into the harry potter rap
put on your invisible cloaks, and shine up your brooms
’cause there ain’t nothin’ better than a hogsmeade trip on mushrooms!
[chorus]
gryffindor, hufflepuff, ravenclaw, slytherin
drinkin’ pumpkin juice and gin
gryffindor, hufflepuff, ravenclaw, slytherin
let the harry potter rap begin
gryffindor, hufflepuff, ravenclaw, slytherin
drinkin’ pumpkin juice and gin
gryffindor, hufflepuff, ravenclaw, slytherin
let the harry potter rap begin
(pour some out for harry potter’s parents)
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