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lirik lagu mistake of color - damage (secret song)

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[intro]
conversations in the mirror from decisions that i’ve made
is this the life that i’ve attained?
a hidden hand of guidance comforting when i’m afraid
of all my wrong decisions
with results i can’t erase

loans to pay my bills, for my masters, i’m a slave
a bachelorette can change me, but won’t save me from the pain
of knowin’ all my life i walked a path that others paved
no room to breathe, a shade of oxygen, or even sp~ce

[verse 1]
my mother callin’, stressin’ me, still asks to see my major
or rather, see me changе it
she ain’t seein’ what i’m made of
my daddy, i ain’t talk to in a few, no motivation
somеtimes i worry me about the path that i’ve created

so many hopes and dreams that ain’t alignin’ wit’ the nature
society has offered me, but still i try, i’m patient
but oftentimes it feels that often, time ain’t what i’m savin’
cause time is slipping by, and it is “i” that i’ve created

my past collidin’ with the present, constantly, that’s now
and every choice i make, the consequences gettin’ greater
an observation that i’m making, i’m aware of, “now”
never later, from creator, kether’s flowing through my crown
i got stamina, residual’s
an overflowin’ visual
from my sigils, engrained
deep within’ my inner consciousness

of all the rhymes that i pick up, it’s obvious i’m far ahead
my vibration exceeding non~competin’ with the frail

[chorus]
if this is everything that i can change, then i don’t want it, no more
if this is how it starts, then i don’t know if i can take these four more
god balance my equation, with the greatest passion
i can’t stick this landin’, can’t take expansion
i can’t take this damage

[verse 2]
growin’, every cycle, from my death, a life begins
and i’m alive
i’ve seen the light
it’s mine, i’ve spoke to him
i ask him if he’s found through recitation ’n through hymns
is this knowledge of our own, or is it found through religion?

do we need a doctrine to tell us how to live
and hear if we don’t feel him, it’s our fault, and never his?
or do you crave experience, from you is how we give?
do you crave a life of good, or do you crave a life of sin?
of murder, of evil, do energies blend in?
is this the reason why ordo ad chao is the gift?
is this the reason why it’s love from l~st that we fall in?
for chaotic desires that i’m feelin’ deep within?

he says to k!ll my ego, so i mutilated him
and punctured it with wounds so i could see the light shine through
and have another conversation, turn another chapter
universal light i’m after and
it’s found through only matter

so do i matter, in this realm of mattered sp~ce?
if energy’s continuous, it ceases to erase
if 2 makes the 4, can the 4 make the 2?
cause honestly, sometimes, wish i could depress from this new

return to the veil of non existence i came through
to act upon my passion, find the drive that i’ll pursue
attack wit’ my compassion, never hold a grudge, i’d lose
‘cause that’d mean that i fell through towards the bottom, next to you

‘n i don’t ever wanna be like you, so constantly, i’m changin’
i was metal, i was stained ‘n always scared of transformation
didn’t wanna live the life that you provided, it was drainin’
so restrictive in its nature, tried to nurture, i found nature
no complainin’, ‘cause abundance in my future, imma take it
as i lie across my bed, this dorm is feeling rather caved in
one day i’ll reminisce upon these weeks in college dormitories
all the pain it gave one day will be alleviated

[chorus]
if this is everything that i can change, then i don’t want it, no more
if this is how it starts, then i don’t know if i can take these four more
god balance my equation, with the greatest passion
i can’t stick this landin’, can’t take expansion
i can’t take this damage


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