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lirik lagu miranda july - how's my driving

[verse 1]
well, i’ve never seen you here before
that’s ’cause i’m new. my name’s penny
penny, eh? is that your real name, penny?
yes
well, i’ll bet it is. so, can you—can you see me, penny, or is this a one~way mirror?
i can see you, sir
good, ha, that’s the way i like it. you—you a portland girl, penny?
no, i’m from california
oh, cali! i lived in frisco for a while. san fran. they call that “the city that never sleeps”
oh, um, did you want me to take off my shirt or anything, sir?
oh, no, you’re just perfect like that, penny. so, what part of cali did you live in? socal?
~laughter and gasp~

[verse 2]
did you wanna mail that first~class?
oh, no. book rate
rеally? feels a little light to be books. are you surе it isn’t cloth or clothing?
oh, it is clo—it’s a cloth book. i make washable art books for children. oh, you have a child! well, then, you know what i’m talkin’ about. do—do i have a child? yes, her name is penny. how old is she? she’s twelve. oh, i thought you meant “how many children do i have?” have twelve children, um, i adopted them all last year; it’s part of a program f—for book~makers like myself, so tha—that would be book rate on that (~vocalisations~)
~laughter and gasp~
how am i driving so far?

[verse 3]
i first started ly—i mean, driving, when i was fi—s—five years old, and since i was just a little girl, i just told little—drove short distances in a little car. it was a kiddie car. my mom would say to me, “penny, you need to stop driving and start playing.” she wanted me to play with a ball or swing on a swing. we had a little swing hangin’ off of the big tree in the front yard; it—it was a kiddie swing. she would say, “penny, if you don’t stop driving, you’re gonna end up armless and legless. and then what will you do?” and i would say, “mom, you should know i am alert. i am very, very careful.”

[verse 4]
so, what part of cali did you say you were from?
um, i’m from the bay area
oh, really? whereabout?
i’m from berkeley
oh, small world! i graduated uc berkeley. what street did you live on?
um, did you—did you want me to bend over or anything, sir?
oh, no, you’re just perfect like that, princess. so, what street did you say you lived on?
um, i—i didn’t. what street did you live on, sir?
[verse 5]
the thing about walking, as compared to driving, is that when you’re walking, you really don’t know what’s gonna happen to you. you could trip and fall, or get hit by a rock, or, like, this one time, when i was walking to the store to get a soda, i saw this kid up ahead of me on a tricycle. and i didn’t think anything; i just thought “kid on a trike”. and then the kid turns around and it’s, “oh, no. i knew i’d see this someday. why today? i just wanted a soda.” the kid has no face. he’s faceless. it’s just smooth and bald, like a blank sp~ce to fill in, like, like “learn to draw a face”. i knew i’d see it someday, the kid with no face on a trike, but why today? i just wanted a soda. and, somehow, i can tell that he is laughing at me, even with no mouth and no sound and no eyes. it is his chin; his chin is shaking in the rhythm of laughter
~faceless kid laugh~
it is terrifying. but i know exactly what to do. if he is the kid with no face on a trike, then i know who i am. he is the kid with no face on a trike; i know who i am. if he is the kid with no face on a trike, then i must be the terrified person, and i know exactly what to do. i turned around and ran back down the block, i got in my car and started driving, and, well, as you can see, i never stopped. here i am, driving along, lying my ass off

[verse 6]
so, what street did you live on?
i lived on blake street
tha—that’s my street! i grew up on that street. wh—ho—how do you know about me?
whoa, there, princess. i don’t know anything about you. i just came in for a show
well, did you live in a house or an apartment on blake street?
who, me? well, why don’t you bend over now, penny? i’d like to see the rear view
okay. did you live in a house or an apartment? how am i driving so far?
~laughter and gasp~

[verse 7]
the thing about walking, as compared to driving, is that when you’re walking, you really don’t know what’s gonna happen to you. you could trip and fall, or you could get hit by a rock or a car, or a person could hit you, could yell at your ass. but while i’m driving, i always know that i’m going to die in a car crash, and that is so simple. it just makes me feel relaxed, like i can be myself. me? i am going blind, but i am holding with drugs. you see me? i see fine. you see? i seem fine. you say, “how is your medical condition? did the doctors ever clear that up?” i say, “bell, a—as clear yourself for s—” no. “bell, a—as clear yourself for s—” no. i say, “see for yourself, clear as a bell, but you should know i am going blind. i am alert and i am withholding drugs—” no. “i am holding with drugs, like dexamethasone, sulfacetamide, prednisolone, tobramycin, psyprophyoxacin, urithramycin, triceratops, dexamethasone, and all the dinosaurs, apollo 13, sulfacetamide, sky & telescope, sasquatch in the snow, nasa cover~up, stegosaurus, tyrannosaurus rex, dexamethasone. bell, a—as clear yourself for see. ha, ha, how am i driving?

[verse 8]
did you live in a house or an apartment on blake street?
oh, me? i lived in a house. did you live in a house, penny?
i can’t answer any more questions, sir. what color was the house?
the house was—what color was your house, penny?
no, i can’t answer questions. could—could you please go first?
the house was blue and white
[verse 9]
people ask me, they say, “penny, don’t you think it’s a little unhealthy driving all the time? i mean, you drive to everyone, even strangers. you could be driving to me right now and i wouldn’t even know it.” and i say, “you are right. i’m gonna pull over right now and get out of the car and start walking, and i’m gonna walk and walk and walk and walk.”

[verse 10]
the house was blue and white, with a big tree in the front yard and a little swing hangin’ off of the tree. ~laughs~ it was a kiddie swing
yeah, yeah, that was my swing. i—i lived in that house. if—if you’re the man who lived in the blue and white house, then i must be—if you’re the man who lived in the blue and white house, then i must be—~faceless kid laugh~
it’s a small, small world, penny
don’t call me penny. you know who i am, and you are way too close, sir. could you please step away from the glass?

[verse 11]
“and walk and walk. and i’m gonna keep on walking until i find myself”
~faceless kid laugh~
just kidding. but seriously, i’ve been driving for so long now that i am armless and legless, but you should know i am alert and i am very, very careful every second of every hour of every day of my life, and you can be too. clowns never lie, and i don’t either

[verse 12]
are you interested in a live fantasy show, sir?
why, yes, i am interested. i’ve never seen you here before
that’s ’cause i’m new. my name’s penny
penny, eh? is that your real name, penny?
yes
well, i’ll bet it is. so, can you see me, penny, or is this a one~way mirror?
i can see you, sir
good, that’s the way i like it. you a portland girl, penny?
yes i am, born and raised

- lirik lagu miranda july

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