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lirik lagu mc chris - magic (skit two)

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kyle xy: well h-llo and welcome to the underground…

all: ssshhhhh!

kyle xy: sorry, sorry. h-llo and welcome to the underground, this is darth kyle, my new name is kyle xy because that’s the show i miss the most, in this brand new zombie apocalypse.

all: may the force be with you.

kyle xy: we’ve been living 3 months basically on our wits, we’re running out of food, we’ve been begun to hunt but animals have become scarce. it may be time to move to the forbidden lands.

all: may the force be with you.

kyle xy: we’re gonna go around and just say our name and say how the zombie apocalypse has affected us and what summer movie we are looking forward to the most.

all: may the force be with you.

1st mimsy: hey, um, i was uh, formerly “ig89”, and then i was “sawyer’s gun stash” and now i am “the first mimsy.” and… (may the force be with you, ssshhhh, ok, go ahead) ok, it’s been rough, i’ve got to admit it’s been pretty hard. my mother, god rest her soul, was eaten by zombies. my brother was eaten by zombies. my father was eaten by zombies, they’re still living at the house and i have not been able to get my legend of the overfiend dvds out of my room. now, i ordered that on amazon and it cost me $175, i haven’t been able to m-st-rb-t- to it and its been something i’ve been wanting to m-st-rb-t- to since i was 16 and i first saw it, i’m p-ssed.

all: may the force be with you.

mc chris: thats tough.

resident stevil: wait, legend of the overfiend?

1st mimsy: legend of the overfiend.

resident stevil: just get la blue girl, la blue girl’s better.

1st mimsy: i don’t care, i’d rather wath the thing that i ordered.

all: may the force be with you.

mr shark: i am jimmie, airquotes, “the zombie” stewart. my new name is “mr shark.” (may the force be with you, may the the force be with me)

kyle xy: ssshhh, you seriously have to lower your voice, we’re gonna die if they hear you.

mr shark: i don’t… stipulate, i’m stipulating i want to call this the alleged zombie apocalypse. i still don’t think that zombies exist. ah, it’s impossible, it’s against the laws of all logic and science (argument breaks out in a whisper, ‘we see them everyday’) you see zombies like you see the 2 women looking at each other, whereas it’s really just a picture of a vase, and no zombies. (i know what your talking about) and i’m looking forward to the new indiana jones movie to verify my latest correct theory that the crystal skull of indiana jones and the crystal skull was in fact, the skull of jar jar binks, the gungan from the movie battlestar galactica. (may the force be with you, argument breaks out ‘that was phantom menace’)

resident stevil: i’m formerly jackie the hut, and roland of cilliad (may the force be with you). my new nickname is “resident stevil.” (may the force be with you) i think this has been hard on all of us, the hardest thing was going back to my home to try to get supplies and finding my godd-mn lying, cheating wife and her f-ck buddy, and they were both zombies, but they were still f-cking wailing on each other, they were just 69ing, in my bed, my 1, 600 dollar…(thats an expensive bed) sleep piece. (tempurpedic?) tempurpedic, nice bed. f-cking wh-r-, f-cking zombie sh-t juice all over, f-cking disgusting. i got to really tear them apart with the lawn mower. (may the force be with you, alleged zombie, alleged zombie, yes) and i’m really looking forward to the mummy 3, even though i thought the first 2 movies and scorpion king were both the f-cking worst movies i’ve ever seen in my life.

darth of the dead: you guys might know me as “darth chh chha dootico” or “darth chh chaa gracie.” now i’m known as “darth of the dead.” (may the force be with you, ssshhhh!) the apocalypse has been very hard on me, i spent the first 3 weeks of the apocalypse by myself trapped inside of a shopping mall, specifically the back room of a spencer’s gifts. all i was able to subsist on was edible underwear but i did find out, if you guys ever heard of, zombies do not like fart spray, it wards them off. (thoughtful murmurs) i have to say that i’m very excited about the dark knight movie. i’m hoping that if any good comes out of this zombie apocalypse, hopefully heath ledger might rise from his grave and reprise his role as the joker in future batman movies. (too soon!) too soon? may the force be with you.

when in romero: my name was “greedo 1977,” and then it was “bas-m-nt safe,” and now its “when in romero.” (may the force be with you. can you lower your voice, lower your voice they’ll kill us!) i was very…

mc chris: hey i hear you guys up there!

(sssshhhhh!)

mc chris: hey, hey you guys!

(whispering, chris? mc chris? he looks like a zombie! a zombie!)

mc chris: throw down a rope ladder, let me climb up there, i wanna eat your brains!

(‘you got blood coming out of your eyes!’ ‘you want to eat our brains?’ ‘yeah! please!’ ‘then no, why would we let you do that?’, ‘that’s ridiculous’, ‘thats a really f-cked thing to ask us to do’)

mc chris: guys, just throw down the rope ladder, let me come on up there, sounds like your having fun.

(murmuring ‘abso- no way, its ridiculous you even ask us to do it, why would we even do that, it makes no sense’)

mc chris: just let me have some of your sodas, some of your beans. oh and i wanna eat your head, i can’t…

(oh, now there you go, now we’re not gonna let you up)

mc chris: i don’t know, pretense, i’m no good with it. i just wanna get up there.

(we were close to letting you up but we’re not letting you up cuz you’re gonna eat our brains.)
(look, what do you think ironman is gonna be like, you think its gonna be ok? discussion breaks out)

mc chris: well, i’m pretty excited about it because samuel l. jackson is gonna play nick fury in both incredible hulk and the ironman movie which kind of opens up a, just a pandoras box of what could be in the marvel universe.

(you know what forget this, ok, this isn’t even worth having a conversation about, i got some salvia, lets smoke up some salvia gang. smoking sounds, ‘whhooa! you don’t even know!)

- lirik lagu mc chris

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