lirik lagu maeve noiré - too many mouths
you already know how this goes for me—
you’ve seen it a hundred times
the second there’s more than two people talking
my whole world fractures into overlapping lines
voices slam into each other
mouths blur like a broken film reel
and i’m standing there pretending
hoping no one notices how little i can actually feel
you know i can’t follow ten conversations at once
h~ll, i can barely catch one
when the lighting’s wrong
or someone decides to turn their head mid~sentence
but still—
you drag me into the chaos like i’m built for it
like i’m not held together by guesswork
and the hope that someone will slow down for thirty seconds
and when i fall silent
you look disappointed
like i ruined the night
by being exactly who i warned you i was
every time, i tell you the same truth—
i can’t compete with a crowd
but you only hear it
when it’s too d~mn loud
i can’t compete with a crowd
so stop throwing me in one
and acting shocked when i drown
i can’t hear your jokes
your cues
your cues
your cues
that you toss like fireworks and expect me to catch
and when i fall behind
you act like it’s a personal mismatch
i told you i don’t function like you
so why pretend i do?
i can’t compete with a crowd—
and you know that, too
do you understand how humiliating it is
to stand in a room full of people
and not catch a single thread of what’s happening?
to watch their faces light up
their voices climb
their reactions sync like perfect choreography—
while i’m stuck trying to lipread six dancers
moving in every direction at once?
you force me into places
where i’m already defeated before i walk in the door
you call it “fun,”
you call it “just a hangout,”
but to me it’s a battlefield
with no armor, no map
and no way out but silence
and when i freeze
when i smile late
when i nod at the wrong moment—
you give me that look
that pity~flavored disappointment
you swear you don’t mean
but i feel like a bruise every time
stop getting mad at me
for failing tests i never signed up to take
stop putting me in crowds
and calling it “letting me be included.”
inclusion without access
is just another way to isolate someone
in plain sight
i can’t compete with a crowd
so stop dragging me into the noise
and asking why i shut down
i can’t juggle ten voices
all crashing into each other like storms—
and you know d~mn well
my world doesn’t work in that form
so when i go quiet
don’t act confused
i told you already—
i can’t compete with a crowd
i was never built for what you’re used to
i’m not antisocial
i’m not dramatic
i’m deaf
there’s a difference
and every time you ignore it
you turn me into the problem
instead of fixing the environment
stop expecting me to thrive
in places you wouldn’t last ten seconds
if you had to hear the world like i do
i can’t hear chaos
i can’t lipread ten faces
i can’t track voices
flying like broken birds in a cage
and i’m tired—
so tired—
of pretending i can
i can’t compete with a crowd
so stop forcing me to perform like i’m hearing
stop dragging me into rooms
where you know i’ll spend the whole time disappearing
i can’t decode this noise
this chaos, this blur—
and i’m done being punished
for what i can’t endure
i told you who i am
i told you what i need
stop throwing me in crowds—
and calling it “making me feel seen.”
if you wanted me included
you would’ve listened
but instead
you handed me noise
and called it love
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