lirik lagu luna (aus) - toxic remedies
(verse 1: luna)
i don’t know how to feel man
now i’m empty i don’t want to feel
addicted toxic remedies that keep me lost in tendencies
that keep me locked in a box
gone but never forgotten even beyond the end of me
i’m going for a risk
no matter the cost or what that i’ve lost
manifesting this energy i know you need to be seeing me change
i’ve had to rewire every piece of my brain and the way i behave
to be able to channel my destiny
the paink!llers k!lled the pain
but well and truly could be the death of me
i’m feeling guilt and ashamed
i ruined what i thought was meant to be
i wish you’d hear me out
so we could attempt to speak
mixing these pills is a recipe for disaster
but it’s the only way that’s helping me
i can’t get used to the change cause without you in my life i’m feeling empty
the damage i caused i want to try rebuild a relationship
and start again for renly
please don’t let her grow up in a broken home
so just know i miss you both endlessly
and if i let go, i get filled with suicidal tendencies
demons on my mind won’t let me be
i’ve got diagnosed with ptsd and bpd
i’m trying to get better so i’ve started engaging in therapy
but no matter how hard i try
i can’t catch the rest i seek
(interlude: luna)
you were my biggest supporter
now it feels like you’re my biggest enemy
you wanted sp~ce cause you needed to heal
how do i re~find the strength in me
i’d stop taking these pills for you
there’s so many memories that fl!cker in my mind
i was so numb i never knew how to feel
it doesn’t feel real, that really gets to me
(verse 2: luna)
i wish i could go back in time and change these toxic decisions
i’m sorry for cheating, no apologies fix it i’m filled regretfully
all i carry is hope for the meanwhile
i wanted to plan out a future with you
i’m grieving in denial, i don’t want to lose you
it leaves me back in that weak cycle
i can’t guarantee much of a future ahead
i’m not coping mentally
i struggle to get to sleep
mind’s overloaded with thoughts i overdose on thoughts to forget you leaving
i bought you a ring with a diamond
it was you that my heart desired
i just wish you would message me
life moves forward but i wanna rewind it
it don’t ever get better
i tried so long to keep my head up
i say i’m doing okay but it’s getting hard to pretend to be i’m spiraling
you knew me best and as i try to deal with this pain
trust me, you wouldn’t understand how my head has been
we had a baby together and i feel like i lost my best friend
every night i write you a letter on the notes on my iphone
i don’t know if i want to send them
all the good times i try to remember
you were the key to my happiness
but how things have changed
it’s affected my depression heaps
had many chances but i know i messed up
if i had one more i wouldn’t take it for granted
you were there for me, when n0body else had been
i’m sorry for my aggressive outbursts
i was blind to see you really cared for me
i never really opened up, because all my trauma sowed me shut
i thank you heaps and i love you heaps
if i was so toxic then i guess you’re free
and if this truly is the end
no matter how much i beg for it, it isn’t easy
i never wanted to be someone that you’d regret to meet
i’ll miss the sound of your voice i’ll miss the love that you gave me thanks for everything
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