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lirik lagu lethalculture - sessions

[chorus]
so this is what honesty sounds like
my voice don’t even recognize me

uh (echoes)

[verse 1]
i don’t really talk
i just bottle it deep
say i’m good when i’m not
then collapse in my sleep

guess i mastered the art
of pretending i’m fine
but i been chokin’ on words
that been trapped in my mind

never told ’em ’bout the nights i cried in the dark
how i smiled in the light just to cover the scars
how i buried my fears ’cause the world don’t care
they just say “man up” like emotions ain’t therе

can i be honest without being seen as wеak?
can i admit that some days i can’t even speak?
that the mirror don’t show what the world wanna see?
it shows a broken kid just dyin’ to be free
i ain’t scared of pain; i’ve lived with it for years
what scares me the most is exposing these tears
like “what if they hear me and still walk away?”
what if i open my soul and they got nothin’ to (say) star~

started way back, when i learned to survive not to feel
just function, just keep hope alive
when dad left the house and mom broke inside
i became a man too early to stem the tide

i was nine with a jaw clenched tight like steel
learned to swallow my truth just to help them heal
had no outlet, so i wrote in notebooks and bled
every rhyme i spit now is what? thoughts in my head

and i hate that i still crave love i don’t trust
like how do you need people but fear them that much
every time i open up it ends in regret
so i shut down fast like i’m dodging a threat

i don’t let ’em get close that’s my self defense
smiles ain’t real they’re just masks that i rent
and i know this ain’t healthy, i been knew that
but trauma don’t leave just ’cause you say “relax”

i’ve buried versions of me that i ain’t mourned yet
pieces i’ve k!lled just to cope with regret
now i’m stitched with survival and silence and shame
walk~in therapy sessions that don’t got a name (echoes)
[verse 2]
you know what hurts the most?

i don’t even know who i am when i ain’t in control
when i ain’t in protect mode, when i drop that rope
what’s left behind the armor? just a soul that’s cold
i’ve lost friends, lost time, lost sleep, and peace

told myself it’s all fine but that lie runs deep
never told n0body that i hated myself
that i been in rooms thinking i should end myself
(echoes with sp~ce)

but i’m here still breathin’, still scarred but standin’
still pennin’ these truths even when they feel damaged
still peelin’ back layers just to find what’s real
still prayin’ one day i’ll remember how to feel

this ain’t a cry for help; this is just me (being) spoken
a lifetime of silence finally broken
so doc’ if you’re listening please don’t try to fix
just let me talk for once, let me exist

and maybe healing don’t mean no pain
maybe it’s just not walking with it every day
maybe it’s not about erasin’ the past
but learning to live without wearing a mask
i’m tired of measuring “worth it;” how much i endure
or thinking i matter more if i suffer more
like my pain gotta be art, or my tears gotta rhyme
like i can’t just break without addressin’ it in lines

i got so used to people not staying
that i stopped respectin’ anyone that care what i’m sayin’
so i vent to these pages; bleed ink ’til it’s done
and pretend i’m okay in the face of the sun

but i’m human i break, i bend, i fall
i got demons in my phone; they don’t answer my calls
i got friends i outgrew ’cause they loved the facade
not the me that’s been grieving, not the me that’s been flawed

if i’m real will they leave, if i’m silent do they stay?
if i vanished for a week would it matter anyway?
i don’t even need answers; i just need to be heard
need someone to listen without twisting my words

[chorus]
so this is what honesty sounds like (yeah)
my voice don’t even recognize me

[interlude]
but maybe that’s the point
maybe healing starts when you stop lying to yourself

this ain’t for the charts
this is a letter from the part of me i always discard
and if you feel me, even once then i did my part
guess silence never healed what was breaking in my heart

(da da dah…)
(echoes)

- lirik lagu lethalculture

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