lirik lagu j-formz - how i managed
[intro: j~formz]
you good on there son? word…i don’t even f~ckin see it…word up, know what i mean?
[verse 1: j~formz]
i put my heart on my sleeve and used rappin to do it
i documented myself when i was actin so stupid
i’ve had times i was lost but had to act like i won
i play chess and sometimes, you gotta act like you’re dumb
but it’s even harder to fail with my kids than in public
keep eatin sh~t everyday and just pretendin you love it
you just keep making these songs when n0body gives a f~ck
convince yourself, for your kids, that what you have, is enough
i say all the right things, but don’t believe it myself
it’s probably pointlеss to say it unless it’s meaning is felt
and through all this bullsh~t, i still try and do right
but еverytime i look for guidance, it’s like i’m blinded by the light
developin the big picture for the sake of the kids
but when your mind’s in the dark, you only see the negatives
so, do i know somethin that they don’t?
or am i a stronger person for goin through somethin that they won’t?
you tell it…
[chorus: j~formz]
cause to my girls, i’m soft, but to these streets, i’m hard
bills paid on time, and yet, i never had a job
married to a great woman, still managed to live
a public figure, yet and still, never neglected my kids
worked hard, stayed in shape regardless of what i ate
and when i wanted to lie, i still gave it to them straight
managed issues with time when years felt like months
i’m not sure how i managed to be everything at once
but, i did……
[verse 2: j~formz]
i managed to wanna die, yet i kept myself alive
and still mustered up a smile while i was cryin inside
i’ve given hope to strangers when i was hopeless myself
kept my kids on track while losin focus, myself
i’ve gone days without sleep and still inspired somebody
i got a classic catalogue when this is all just a hobby
i’ve been a villain to the public, superhero to my girls
stayed reppin my turf as i went and traveled the world
i’ve been the student, the teacher, and both at once
i’ve hated what you did and still showed that love
but i ain’t perfect, too many times, i make a mistake
and you ain’t even there to see it, it’s my family that pays
but now the weight is too much, it makes me feel like i’m smothered
i gotta sacrifice and trade in one thing for the other
i’m on the ledge, if i keep this up? i take that jump
i’ve had enough of tryin hard to be everything at once
i’m gone…
[chorus: j~formz]
cause to my girls, i’m soft, but to these streets, i’m hard
bills paid on time, and yet, i never had a job
married to a great woman, still managed to live
a public figure, yet and still, never neglected my kids
worked hard, stayed in shape regardless of what i ate
and when i wanted to lie, i still gave it to them straight
managed issues with time when years felt like months
i’m not sure how i managed to be everything at once
but, i did……
[outro:]
chuckie:
it’s no different than you giving up hockey at one point, realizing it wasn’t gonna happen…
j~formz:
but again, that’s not what’s happening here…to me, this is a completion of something, not a “quitting” of something…
chuckie:
right, but…did it work out the way you wanted it to? probably not, i’m sure there’s lots of things you would’ve changed…did it work out half as good?
j~formz:
it didn’t work out the way i wanted it to when i started, but it worked out the way i wanted it to as i’m finishing it…
chuckie:
so then, that’s all that should matter…you’re not quittin, you’re walking away from something, you completed it……
j~formz:
bro, just in the past year or two (you probably don’t even know this, i probably didn’t even tell you this), just in the past year or two, i’ve turned down two record contracts…
chuckie:
nah, i didn’t know that…
j~formz:
i’m not interested bro…i’m not out there actively pursuing it, i don’t wanna do it…if you paid me 10 million dollars!? i’d probably go on tour…if you let me keep 100% of my music: publishing, 100% writers, all this type of sh~t…and you basically just give me a green light to: whenever i wanna do something, you’re gonna fund it!? that’s not realistic, it’s never gonna happen…so, in short, i’m never gonna sign a record contract…so for me, as a person, when i look back at what i’ve done: i feel like i’m putting like the remote down for a video game like when you, when you go on youtube and you type n like: “complete mario in 11 minutes” and i’m putting the f~ckin remote down and i’m like: “peace bro…i just f~cked everybody’s sh~t up!” you don’t have to hear me, you don’t have to agree with my perspective…
chuckie:
i mean, what everyone else feels is irrelevant…if you feel that way, like i said, it’s an art, so, then…
j~formz:
i genuinely…that’s genuinely how i feel, from the bottom of my heart…
chuckie:
f~ck em…
j~formz:
that like, i came here, i did something that i really probably should’ve never done…i left the nba, i came back to this small league but i dominated, and i’m walking away now…i’m not quitting playing basketball, i’m going back to where i was now, peace!
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