lirik lagu hexa - clockworks
[verse 1]
tick tock, the pendulum swings
i got a ziploc with bud filled up to the brim stuffed
get lit, f~cked then pen it all into hip hop
spit and barf sick as f~ck just to lift the bar i hit just
to mental unhinge
this heart picks up on its rush, and its cogs
ticking triggering us to pencil some sh~t
turning and twisting the words as if by clockwork it cl!cks
hours pass in the hourglass, let out a solemn gasp
i rest knowing that my entire life is caving in
the sand already sank to the bottom and back again
have no time left and done reversed my circadian rhythm
live at night, no light, like a bat in a cavern
living underground writing subterranean lyrics
suffer mental collapsе but every night i lie awakе in bed
i write the sickest getting better imagination triggers
the bells ring, began to sing
get up, get back in the cyclical swing of things
made it out of h~ll but realized n0body gives a sh~t
turned inwards, split and now i’m on some limbo sh~t
purgatory built before me, a prison inside my skin
i live for nothing but doing my own thing
spitting these rhymes, thats it miserable lonely existence
i loathe this demon who’s broken me but at least i know him
i’m so cold, sub zero, alone throwing stones in a glass home
i’m a broken cogwork it can’t be repaired its past its date of expiration my psyche like the antikythera mechanism
hope it dont implode i can’t really clear the pessimism
come for your throat, cause if i dont, i’ll go for my own
more than just a few screws loose in my frontal lobes
first a chokehold then choke held by rope i’m nuts and bolts
thunderstruck with a hundred volts to the confidence
[bridge]
i want, i want, i wonder
i want, i want, i wonder
i want, i want, i wonder
i want, i want, subconscious
[verse 2]
i want to change and be a better version of me
i want to recreate friendships and treat em respectfully
i want to become someone who i’m proud to be
but roll another joint, i lack the will and motherf~cking energy
and i want to wake up feeling energized
i’m f~cking drained but barely fall asleep at night
i toss and turn, god knows i might’ve tried, and cried
but i lack the will to get out the bed in time
i want to train and exercise
take care of where i stand in life
take a hike, fix sh~t, get drive and maybe grow revived
yet i lack the will to even stay alive
i want to have a productive day
i know, where there is a will there is a way
but not today, i say, as i grimly turn around again
and i lack the will to try today, sleep feels like a death i can attain
and i want to get green, treat my body right
remove what fire burns in my sarcophagi
but god, these drugs turn my blood to ice
and i lack the will to give up, so i get h~lla high
i want to find love, but i’m just stuck on the side of
my mind lost, missing my ex so much it’s like i might’ huv
already lost the one and thus i can’t recurve my luck
god d~mn it, i lack the will to give up memories
and i want to rap, attack tracks like the d~mn black death
infect records, but instead i get more dreaded and sad
attempt to do my best and remember that’s that
but i can’t, and i lack the will to step up my game or step back
i want to be alive but only if it really feels like life
not only a slight reflection of what it used to be like
i want to rise like a phoenix, wield fire and be like it
but i lack the will to even get a lighter for my cig
i want to feel at peace, but my life is a war
always been fighting myself and then hiding the scars
i want to apologize for all i did wrong
and for all i did right but never right enough
i want to die, constantly overcontemplating
suicidal thoughts and trouble concentrating
might attempt to reach valhalla blast my head apart
i lack the will to keep on trying to light a world so dark
when i die i’ll never enter the kingdom of god
and i’m beginning to get anxious
my mental illness kicks in
argue with myself silently fidgeting
i see things as if tripping on dimethyltryptamine
spirits, delusions, demons i can see everything
low and behold these
these cold flows of an old soul
frozen bones, broken ghost and odours of pot smoke
mental state of energy peaks
f~cking thunderbolts
streams through the brain, powers the prefrontal lobe
from main to escape wheel
from neurons to blood
my muscles the spring winding up my thoughts
my mind is a clock, help me rise up
notice when its dawn, day, night, dusk
liquid time in perpetual motion stops
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