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lirik lagu gideon wagner - walt whitman - as i ebb'd with the ocean of life

as i ebb’d with the ocean of life
as i wended the shores i know
as i walk’d where the ripples continually wash you paumanok
where they rustle up ho~rs~ and sibilant
where the fierce old mother endlessly cries for her castaways
i musing late in the autumn day, gazing off southward
held by this electric self out of the pride of which i utter poems
was seiz’d by the spirit that trails in the lines underfoot
thе rim, the sediment that stands for all thе water and all the land of the globe

fascinated, my eyes reverting from the south, dropt, to follow those slender windrows
chaff, straw, splinters of wood, weeds, and the sea~gluten
scum, scales from shining rocks, leaves of salt~lettuce, left by the tide
miles walking, the sound of breaking waves the other side of me
paumanok there and then as i thought the old thought of likenesses
these you presented to me you fish~shaped island
as i wended the shores i know
as i walk’d with that electric self seeking types

as i wend to the shores i know not
as i list to the dirge, the voices of men and women wreck’d
as i inhale the impalpable breezes that set in upon me
as the ocean so mysterious rolls toward me closer and closer
i too but signify at the utmost a little wash’d~up drift
a few sands and dead leaves to gather
gather, and merge myself as part of the sands and drift
o baffled, balk’d, bent to the very earth
oppress’d with myself that i have dared to open my mouth
aware now that amid all that blab whose echoes recoil upon me i have not once had the least idea who or what i am
but that before all my arrogant poems the real me stands yet untouch’d, untold, altogether unreach’d
withdrawn far, mocking me with mock~congratulatory signs and bows
with peals of distant ironical laughter at every word i have written
pointing in silence to these songs, and then to the sand beneath

i perceive i have not really understood any thing, not a single object, and that no man ever can
nature here in sight of the sea taking advantage of me to dart upon me and sting me
because i have dared to open my mouth to sing at all

you oceans both, i close with you
we murmur alike reproachfully rolling sands and drift, knowing not why
these little shreds indeed standing for you and me and all

you friable shore with trails of debris
you fish~shaped island, i take what is underfoot
what is yours is mine my father

i too paumanok
i too have bubbled up, floated the measureless float, and been wash’d on your shores
i too am but a trail of drift and debris
i too leave little wrecks upon you, you fish~shaped island

i throw myself upon your breast my father
i cling to you so that you cannot unloose me
i hold you so firm till you answer me something
kiss me my father
touch me with your lips as i touch those i love
breathe to me while i hold you close the secret of the murmuring i envy

ebb, ocean of life, (the flow will return,)
cease not your moaning you fierce old mother
endlessly cry for your castaways, but fear not, deny not me
rustle not up so ho~rs~ and angry against my feet as i touch you or gather from you

i mean tenderly by you and all
i gather for myself and for this phantom looking down where we lead, and following me and mine

me and mine, loose windrows, little corpses
froth, snowy white, and bubbles
(see, from my dead lips the ooze exuding at last
see, the prismatic colors glistening and rolling,)
tufts of straw, sands, fragments
buoy’d hither from many moods, one contradicting another
from the storm, the long calm, the darkness, the swell
musing, pondering, a breath, a briny tear, a dab of liquid or soil
up just as much out of fathomless workings fermented and thrown
a limp blossom or two, torn, just as much over waves floating, drifted at random
just as much for us that sobbing dirge of nature
just as much whence we come that blare of the cloud~trumpets
we, capricious, brought hither we know not whence, spread out before you
you up there walking or sitting
whoever you are, we too lie in drifts at your feet

- lirik lagu gideon wagner

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