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lirik lagu francis lastname - moral panic pornstar

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[verse 1]
i talk like i’ve done it all before
but the thoughts in my head i can’t bare to ignore
i know that i want it but i’m scared to the core
want you inside but then i have to close the door
every kiss feels like a scalpel trying to cut me
just sharp enough to remind me that i’m still scared
i wanna let go and my hands are all sweaty
but the more kisses keep coming the more it feels like a machete
i feel safest when i’m down on my knees
’cause when i’m standing up, that means i have to face me
it almost feels like it isn’t worth it
but i know what i desire and i’ve gotta serve it

[pre~chorus]
i want your touch to warm me but it feels like it’s burning
can’t get to 4th base without my stomach churning
i’m trapped in my head like a familiar song
oh god, sometimes i think i’m doing it wrong
i want you to touch me but sometimes it’s hard
i want you to do it but i feel like i can’t
i just need for all these thoughts to go away
but honestly life just doesn’t work that way

[chorus]
i can’t do sh~t without feeling repulsed
guilt and self hatred is always my result
i crave to be appealing but sometimes it’s hard
to recognise that deep down i’m just a moral panic p~rnstar
i’m a moral panic p~rnstar
i’m a moral panic p~rnstar
i’m a moral panic p~rnstar
[post~chorus]
i’ll never be how i want to see
so i hide inside my memory
no, i’ll never be how i want to be
so i cling to what’s left of me

[bridge]
i’m torn between what i want and what’s healthy for me
do i put myself out there, or just leave me be
i feel so pressured to make the right choice
but honestly i don’t f~cking know which one is the right choice
and i feel so disgusting but i know that i’m not
except my mind betrays my body and portrays me as something i’m not
i know it sounds like i’m crazy but i really just need
someone to f~cking listen to me and give me what i need

but i know
that’s a hard
expectation
so i’ve come
to the
conclusion

[chorus]
a moral panic p~rnstar
a moral panic p~rnstar
i can’t do this anymore
i’ve played this game before
all it does is make me feel even sh~ttier than before
no, i can’t do this anymore
i’ve played this game before
all it does is make me feel even sh~ttier than before

[outro]
so i guess
all i need is patience
if i lay off myself and give me some grace
then i’ll figure out what i really need
and until then, what i know is i need some sp~ce

and maybe finally i will learn to love and embrace
the way i feel about my body, and my face
then maybe, i’ll finally, be able to plunge into the deep end

a moral panic p~rnstar


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