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lirik lagu epic rap batles of history - dwight schrute vs pol pot

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[intro]
epic rap batles of history
dwight schrute
versus
pol pot
begin

[verse 1: dwight schrute]
i’ll be honest with you pol, you’re in a rough spot
i volunteer solving crimes relating to pot
assistant regional manager, dunder mifflin pc;
about to leave your face sore like a visit from the kgb
i’m a leader in the field, just ask mose
the way you’re running your regime tells me you’re not even close
the difference between us is striking; for starters
i farm beets, you beat farmers
you think you’re a good leader? don’t be silly
you dropped your country’s lifе expectancy like a pol pot of chili
whеn building utopias, intellectuals are valuable assets
you shot ’em down just for wearing glasses
you must be blind if that’s your “communist vision”
pol, you tortured practicing pacifists into submission!
i’ll notify upper management ’bout your nation’s conditions
when you’re inevitably fired, i’ll apply for your position

[verse 2: pol pot]
my guards told me not a threat was in sight
and after hearing that verse i can tell that they were right
i mean come on! who do you think’s gonna win in a fight?
a revolutionary dictator, or a little b~tch named dwight?
only war crime here is your style, man
looking like your base of operations is a white van
the dahmer glasses are enough, don’t take it farther
kim jong~un is worried, you should give him back his barber
if you wanna rise through the ranks, this is vital;
you don’t get respect from imaginary titles
you lack authority, you don’t have the spine
try to kiss my ass like michael’s and you’ll get the mat~49
like pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pot, f~ck ‘em up
pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, i’mma do my stuff
i’ll stop at nothing, if i want change i’ll bring it
and i can’t see a better world with you in it
[verse 3: dwight schrute]
that’s a whole lot of cr~p from pol potty
i warn you, you’re messing with a black belt in karate
the khmer rouge aren’t festive, hardly
a democratic state but only one party
you dreamt about a paradise for commies; kampuchea
made a stir and left it fully rotten; kombucha
you never stood a chance against rhymes like these
i’ve just toppled the pot like the vietnamese

[verse 4: pol pot]
yikes, i would spend the night sleeping in a bed full of tarantulas
before i’d ever spend a night in angela’s
i only need one party, i’m a great host
disagree, they’ll find you wrapped around another gatepost
don’t need a mug to tell me who the best boss is
i’m a god amongst men, you’re just from the office!
soldiers! it’s time for some western expansion
i think we could do some good over in scranton

[outro: the announcer, dwight shrute, cambodian announcer]:
who won?
who’s next?
you decide~
epic rap~
who are you? where’s the announcer?
i’m trying to do the outro, dwight. epic rap~
you’re not the announcer, i heard him just seconds ago
it’s me, dwight. look, i have the logo right here and everything! okay? epic~
identity theft is not a joke, millions of families suffer every~
ugh… epic rap batles of history


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