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lirik lagu cxrter - confessions (feat. camila)

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[chorus: camila]
these are my confessions
and even though i might regret this
tried to find hope in a bottle
don’t know if i’ve hit the bottom
these are my confessions
even though i might regret this
i fell right into autumn
don’t know if i’ve hit the bottom, no

[verse: cxrter]
there are some things i must confess
just to get them off my chest
reasons why i’m a mess
reasons why i’m depressed
the reason i’ve been upset
for these twenty two years that i been walking the earth
i never new the people related to me by birth
and thats the tip of the iceberg
i’ve been drowning
on the outside i’ve been clowning
but on the inside i’ve been frowning
i’ve got a disease inside that tries to k!ll me all the time
the devil put him in there, hoping i’d bite the line
this sickness in my mind tried to take my breath from me
like a kiss from death, i wanted more, i was starving
there was no crying out or calling up for help
’cause i’m not addicted, that’s what i convinced myself
i lost everything: trust, love, and freedom
all because the vodka whispered in my ear that i don’t need ‘em
being broken was a part of my identification
being mentally crippled was a welcomed sensation
i couldn’t face it
that i was worth more
i was sure that accepting defeat evened the score
powerless, with countless hours wasted
how was this worth my moral saneness?
[chorus: camila]
these are my confessions
and even though i might regret this
tried to find hope in a bottle
don’t know if i’ve hit the bottom
these are my confessions
even though i might regret this
i fell right into autumn
don’t know if i’ve hit the bottom, no

[verse: cxrter]
this sh~t is baffling
it’s sad to see
the gravity and capacity
it has to be
proactively captured
’til i’m it’s masterpiece
i’ve been sick of living this life
dealing with strife
why the f~ck you think i carry a knife?
i’ve been f~cked up for so long i don’t know what happy is
to me it was to drink through the night ’til i was blasted kid
i had happy but was to sick to grasp it
i had my happy but i was too drunk and i passed it
i spend nights shaking
with a heart that’s been breaking
but i should be in the pavement
so i’ll just lay and take it
after all this is exactly what i earned
with the person that i been, this is exactly what i deserve
i’ve been a drunk, been a psycho, been a fighter, been a liar
been a punk, been a f~ck up, been a hider
f~ck, i’m tired
these are my character defects
the things about me i resent
some of my regrets
the reasons i should be dead


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