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lirik lagu clayton jennings - help

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[verse 1: clayton jennings]
i woke up dependent, i guess this is addiction
i walked to the pharmacy to refill these prescriptions
these feelings are worse than my original symptoms
i’m addicted to trauma, guess i match the description
i use music to escape, so i sit back, and i listen
miserable on this mattress, and i try to envision
life without living, i’m not ashamed to admit it
and if you’ve never walked through the storm i don’t expect you to get it

[hook: brianna caprice & clayton jennings]
i act out of desperation (i’m like, “i feel like i’m going crazy”)
i’m stuck on this medication (i just need somebody to help me)
i need someone to save me from myself
oh, god, i really need your help (i just wanna breathe again)

[verse 2: clayton jennings]
lexapro and adderall with xanax to manage it
depression put me to sleep and woke me up in an ambulance
i wanted permanent rest like a bottle of ambien
it was christmas 2020, i’m just paintin’ the ambience
i almost forgot that i had something to fight for
a family and a fanbase that i’d lay down my life for
i tried carrying burdens christ already died for
you call this poetry, i call it pain through a mic chord
[hook: clayton jennings & brianna caprice]
i act out of desperation
addiction is a slippery slope
and it’s not a respecter of persons or statuses or beliefs
i’m stuck on this medication
you don’t really realize you’re there until you’re stuck
and you’re taking things to keep from feeling sick
rather than to feel better
i need someone to save me from myself
and i don’t judge anybody going through this stuff
my heart goes out to all of you, and
oh, god, i really need your help
i wish i could do more to help see you through

[verse 3: clayton jennings]
i’m so tired of fighting, please just leave me alone
and i need a word from the lord, but i can’t pick up the phone
so i just put on my headphones, i write then record it
i was praised and extorted
and to this day i’m contorted
i got a taste of fame’s fortune, but i couldn’t afford it
she slid me the contract, i picked it up and then tore it
i was circling the drain, stuck in the hollywood orbit
it can’t be from god if the devil adores it
i’m a child of god but feel like i’ve been aborted
i’m stuck in this forest
and now i’m in need of a bridge to get me back to the chorus
[hook: brianna caprice]
does it ever get better?
that’s why i wrote you this letter
i’m empty, broken, and tethered
tell me, does it ever get better?

[verse 4: clayton jennings]
sometimes the hardest thing for me is
is opening up to people
and that’s why i’ve always just done it through poetry
it feels–
to me it feels–
it feels like freedom
the crazy thing is i’ve found that when i get stuff off of my chest
then other people tend to relate to it, and
i know i–
i’m like a mess on the outside, and–
i don’t like that
but if it makes you understand that you’re not alone in your trouble
then it’s worth it for me
so to everybody out there
i just want you to know i read your messages, i see them
i get your letters
and i don’t really understand why you care about me, but
thank you
i thank you for praying for me
and for caring about me and my family
and i think you guys are a big part of why i’m still alive
so if me opening up
potentially helps keep you alive, then
i guess i’ll just keep writing
and we’ll just keep doing this together
because i promise you it does get better


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