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lirik lagu chi therealist - the closure

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lately been having doubts if i should try~even rap

anymore

cuz i can’t afford to waste no time on these tracks

i try to be optimistic anxieties on the attack

i’m panicking approaching 30

and i’m tryna adapt

feel stupid for dreaming lucid ain’t no proof in my path

just hope

could sell dope

i’ll just end up in a trap

i’m starvin

prolly think that that’s a joke cuz i’m fat

burried my grandma i’m still holding it back
i been developing new habits

been f~ckin up priorities

like splurging on my girl because our future is important to me

gotta be more careful make sure i don’t love her more than me

knowing i got some things to focus on that need maturity

gotta learn more about mortgaging

cuz i refuse to sеll the only place that’s evеr been warm to me

when all it need is nourishing

i think it’s less depression and more being broke is boring me

yeah i struggle but i know that triumphs make you more a king

i fell out with some princes over corny beef

something bout some women unimportant to me

i used to love em
now that love is torn to piece

i admit forgetting they exist is still a chore to me

so i imagine the bigger i get how hard it is ignoring me

i laugh at that

and then i celebrate and do the cabbage patch

cuz i love me and that’s a fact

i know i been great ever since chaddrick drove that chadillac

and anyone who can’t see i’m amazing has some cataracts

my brother finally home and he be telling me he needing me

and i get so intimidated

cuz i’m not where i need to be

i’m not where i promised

i been having trouble feeding me
to keep it honest

i think people think it’s easy being me

be thinking i’m transparent

when it’s impossible to see in me

or at least that’s what i think

until a mirror shows the me in me

i know who my mirror is

a queen a goddess i can’t wait to give her kids

and finally have the life that we was meant to live

the diamond in my vision

yeah a gemini

someone who’s has been disappointed plenty times

she deserves a mansion put the rent aside

or atleast to have a life

when i ain’t gotta look at it as sacrifice if i wanna buy her tickets to renaissance

i just want my momma back

badder than black americans that want obama back

badder than george w bush wanted to bomb iraq

badder than i wished that it was me inside that bodybag

badder than me wanting sleep as an insomniac

speaking of insomniac

i turned imaging my bro sleep in that pontiac

never know if one of ya g’z sick

til they mind is snapped

in a cage

my life’s a mortal kombat

where johnny at

when life made death sweeter than surviving… i found power in being a ghost

(not much far left)

i became the cocoon that the b~tterfly left

could no longer hear the music to my ears

though my life was a symphony of survival…

every poem felt like writing a dead man’s story

that story full of semicolons and commas… haven’t gotten to a period yet, (close)

my existence is run~on

eternally grateful for pax & q

gifted me their gift without taxing like jackson hewit

just cause they believed my success

and in fact they knew it was coming when i had trouble imagining breaking through

the roc here on my back feels like a boulder

eventually, here ima need closure

i’m tired but i’m keeping my composure

my grandma ain’t raise nothing but a solider

just hope that in the end they remember me as the closer

therealist


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