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lirik lagu carbon monoxide - pupaphobia

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first order, act it normal
perfect walls, don’t be informal
blinding lights beneath the canopy
ashes won’t repair my vanity

secondly don’t act so vicious
defang, declaw, ain’t that precious?
good victims don’t take up sp~ce
you’re not like that you know your place

i may not be an actor, but
i’ve learned to work faster
discipline is so crucial when
safety means his approval

i may not be an artist but
my fear i will harness
and if you survive today then
maybe we’ll be ok

i think i’m far too aware
living a daily nightmare
dull my brain contain the pain
then wake up do it again

can’t do this any longer
not getting any strongеr
if this is all life is i’d
rather have еternal bliss
breaking
skin loose things beneath my pins i
shake free
strings, past sins, these
ugly tins of mortality

tugging strings
let it sink
play the part
and then you play another

stitching skin
fixing springs
holding back
violent explosive anger

biting cloth
succumbed rot
shut your mouth
and then you take another

luna moth
succumbed sloth
it’s gone south
i’ll be like this forever
keep talking
keep walking
things are fine
dont question what is normal

pull the strings
make me sing
keep dancing
remember you dont matter

how i want to cut the wire
retake my agency
i’m ashamed i should know better
it won’t make me happy

third thing to keep in mind
to you i’ve been nothing but kind
you must cherish my generosity
i know how to treat my property

fourthly, you belong to me
i’m entitled to your body
don’t deprive me of my rights
or else how could you sleep at night?

i may not be so perfect
worthless liminal defect
fear is absolutely needed
when this is how i’m treated
i do not deserve better
but i’m a selfish quitter
i know i’m simply the worst
because that’s just how it works

the clanging thoughts in my head
violence better left unsaid
scared monsters under the bed
they tell me that i deserve it

i’m tired of the sickness
worthless facets of illness
with my autonomy stripped
to my life i’m just a witness

breaking
rules so cruel rewind the spool, i
shake free
doves in love, my
dependence on monstrosity

tugging strings
let it sink
play the part
and then you play another

stitching skin
fixing springs
holding back
violent explosive anger

biting cloth
succumbed rot
shut your mouth
and then you take another

luna moth
succumbed sloth
it’s gone south
i’ll be like this forever

keep talking
keep walking
things are fine
don’t question what is normal

pull the strings
make me sing
keep dancing
remember you dont matter

how i want to cut the wire
retake my agency
i’m ashamed i should know better
it won’t make me happy

i know
five through six, and
i know
gentle mettle
i know
pick up sticks, and
i know
grieving devils
was there
any difference
i feel
mounting pressure
i can
taste dissonance
maybe i’ll
write that letter

oh i know i understand that
you want me at your command but
life just isn’t all that fair i’ll
bite you back, i’ll make you scared

the puppet you once loved has died
you hit and screamed, you made me cry
those fences i’m not amending
you have no place in my
happy ending

no more strings
overthink
cut the sh~t
i’ll tear you into bits
just how many?
how plenty?
120?
with nightmares worth a penny

buried guilt
rome re~built
cracked and spilt
a bloodied plastic mother

“you ok?”
sore and gray
so let’s pray
it won’t be this forever

sitting still
cracked and spilt
no ‘until’
under my feelings’ control

scared and dazed
burned and praised
abstract ways
rip out my beating soul so

now i’ve come to cut the wires
retook my agency
pride that’s lost in paranoia
someday i’ll be happy


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