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lirik lagu b3nj1 - isn't life beautiful?

[verse]
n0body’s perfect, i know it, tell me something new
but the web of images tell me they got a clue
i know it’s a facade to show their best views
but i believe in ’em, so i can’t help but add myself in queue
there’s always the dark hiding under the light
i have been kept safe with my health, but despite that
i’ve been under~protected later in life and now
i can’t help but to act like i don’t see what’s not right
cause i’ve seen death on the internet, i know that i shouldn’t have
i don’t know what drew me in, maybe it’s the life we have
people who die early, people who die surely thinking their life wasn’t bright
and tried to put up a fight
and i’m scared to be silly, i’m scared to be myself
cause i know that one day, i’ll end up on the same shelf
so i try to be careful, making sure that i don’t die
every moment has to count before it passes by
cause you know “you gotta live a happy life”
that’s what they all say
that’s what i try to live by, but i’m scared that it’s fake
am i happy? or is it just a mantra that i live by?
“it could’ve been worse”
could’ve been better too, let me hide
let me ride away, fade away, but not from this earth
even though i think i won’t, i gotta make my life worth
”yolo, yolo, i’ma ride solo”
what you say with suicidal thoughts, but making it not show
but i’m not one to point others like some kinda prophet
can’t tell others how to live, while i’m not the sharpest
and i’m scared to confront myself, i’ll be honest
when i told you i’m myself, i was, i promise
but i’ve changed, i keep changing, every d~mn day
and i thought i’d stay the same every d~mn day
that i’d evolve into a b~tterfly after finding my way
but life has so many more roads on my display
f~ck, am i pretentious?
shut the f~ck up, you f~cking clown
you’re a privileged white male, why are you acting so down?
born in a family with parents who have good pay
while others can barely find a good day
like my friends, they speak out, more than i do too
they get their voices higher while i try to do what they do
i bet they talk about me behind me, it must be in nature
”he’s just a manipulator, he’s just one of them traitors”
question: will i ever know what people truly think of me?
i think that lies are easier than promises one can keep
with many pretending, whenever i want to leap
i do remember i can choose when i can go to sleep
but i’m just a 17~year old, there has to be more than this
but i just started growing up, i can’t live like this
i should’ve known sh~t before
i’ll try to live, hope music will help it
but when my scars turn into ”bars” and i’ve recorded
even after all of that my whole head still feels sore
maybe it’s the art, it’s the music that’s k!lling me
but wait, since i make it all, then it must be me
have i been breaking my back, all the way from the start?
well, i tell new problems, that makes new problems
it repeats til i depart
i bring the pain in my chest out of me to keep the joy
but with no pain, what’s the point?
i can’t go on the internet just telling my dark side of life
i wanna preach happiness too
and with no dark, there can be light
but if that light gets shown i’m left in the dark
oh my f~cking god, can’t i just stop it all?!
is it possible to live a life with no problems?
anxiety, the lies in me tell me to not solve ‘em
call it “human condition”, but i wanna feel invincible
but then i’m not a human, d~mn, isn’t life beautiful?
[outro]
everyday, i tell you that you’re beautiful
i mean it, and i say to make you feel beautiful
i wanna make that you think that life is beautiful
now i see it as a mission to make life beautiful
but is it possible to make life beautiful?
have i taken in too much just to try make life beautiful?
i believe that one day, life can be beautiful
that day will come when i finally say that i’m beautiful

- lirik lagu b3nj1

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