lirik lagu ayekay - lost angeles
[verse 1: ayekay]
the essence of my thought blinded by insecurity
seeking purpose, but my soul buried in this nursery
under the sense of an adolescent, the pressure hurries me
to stretch my ligaments and absorb the globe, the sevens seas
but i’m still here, still here, and i’m boxing off these demons
i’m tryna unbox these locked boxes to find a deeper meaning
but often i’m caught between in, seeking the truth and closet cleaning
where you going, going? where you going, going?
you ain’t going nowhere fast, and you slowing, slowing
that’s what they telling me, telling me, but it’s one ear out the other
i feel like everyone doubting me from my friends to my mother
it’s hurts but i love em, sh-t, i hate it i but need it
sometimes i wake up still breathing, pinching myself, can’t believe it
that i’m still here, searching for life and it’s purpose, hoping
that when i close my eyes, i could see them curtains open…
[verse 1 (part 2): ayekay]
spit it so vicious, cause one day my vision is bound to materialize, and
i’m penning these lyrics so one day you hear ’em instead of all of these lies, that
these rappers be talking about, money and women in large amounts
don’t really amount to sh-t, if you, forgotten about your route
so i take it right back to the basics, pondering on the fake sh-t
thinking about what make it so great to pretend not to have faith in
concepts with aesthetic value, i bomb depths you’d never know how you
would reach unless you had me to crack through the surface like cashew
[verse 2: ayekay]
it’s not about the depth, but about the underlying goal, my
lion heart react, let the rhythm, flow out my soul, a
roar so mighty echo through atmosphere and go
back where your conscious patrol, shots of patron to feel paroled
floating right out of the window, physical free but my spirit is trapped
feeling like i gotta breakthrough so i’m breaking down while i rap
i’m breaking down my soul, but i can never piece it on back, so
now i spit sixteens just to show y’all where i’m at (ungh)
where i’m at, where we at, doing this, doing that
what it matter, if you ain’t know, where you going, man
i don’t know…
[verse 2 (part 2): ayekay)
everyday get harder to wake up, i look in the mirror, i’m not even there
everyday get harder to shape up, shedding a tear, i’ll be living in fear
of myself, my cerebral, putting up these defenses, to stop my senses
these bridges i’ve burned so now i’m resorting to hopping these fences
relentless dependance, but never can i never accept it, so now i just relish
on moments ‘ready p-ssed, don’t get it
how someone you thought was so real could switch and turn cold
you left guessing how they fabricate something real as their soul
feeling my soul peel back like a nine, feel the surge, through my spine
and my ligaments, close my eyes and i can feel my skin again
even if i sin again, know i’m gonna rise back up
the tides gon’ shift, and even when my time is up
gon’ continue to be myself, even when they tell me enough
w’sup, yo, this is me, real as can be, but inside
i open up my thoughts and tell you what you could find
insecurity, purity, kept inside the nursery
the urgency been hurting me, but i’m focusing currently
on my dreams, the currency is just a perk, murder me
if i fail to remain real forever
i wanna send this out, my undying letter
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