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lirik lagu aurelio voltaire - the uss make shit up (live version)

[verse 1]
well, i was stranded on a planet, just me and spock
we met a nasty n~z~ alien, he locked our asses up
we found a hunk of crystal and a metal piece of bed
we made a laser phaser gun and shot him in the head
bust a move dog
well, i was standing on the bridge when sulu came to me
his eyes were full of tears, he said, “captain, can’t you see?
the ship is gonna blow, do something, i beseech”
i grabbed a tribble and some chewing gum and stopped thе warp core breach

[chorus]
and i said
bounce a graviton particlе beam off the main deflector dish
that’s the way we do things, lad, we’re making sh~t up as we wish
the klingons and the romulans they pose no threat to us
’cause if we find we’re in a bind we just make some sh~t up

[verse 2]
i know he’s just a child, and most think him a twit
but wesley is the master when it comes to making up some sh~t
he’s the guy you want with you when you go out in sp~ce
now if only he could beam that pimple off his face
or whatever the f~ck that thing was
and if you’re at a party on the starship enterprise
and the karaoke player just plain old up and dies
set up a neutrino field inside a can of peas
hold on to geordi’s visor and sing into data’s knees
[chorus]
and i said
bounce a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish
that’s the way we do things, lad, we’re making sh~t up as we wish
the klingons and the romulans they pose no threat to us
’cause if we find we’re in a bind we just make some sh~t up

[verse 3]
sisko’s on a mission to go no bl~~dy place
he loiters on a sp~ce station above bajoran sp~ce
the wormhole opened up and now they come from near and far
we’ll keep the booze but please send back the f~cking jem’hadar
and what is with the klingons? remember, in the day
they looked like puerto ricans and they dressed in gold lamé
now they look like heavy metal rockers from the dead
with leather pants and frizzy hair and lobsters on their heads

[chorus]
and i said
bounce a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish
that’s the way we do things, lad, we’re making sh~t up as we wish
the klingons and the romulans, they pose no threat to us
’cause if we find we’re in a bind we just make some sh~t up

[verse 4]
well, i was stuck on voyager, pounding on the door
when suddenly it dawned on me i’ve seen this show before
perhaps i’m in a warp bubble slightly out of phase
cause it was way back in the sixties when they called it “lost in sp~ce”
we were looking for a way to make the ratings soar
so we orchestrated an encounter with the borg
normally you’d think that that would get us into sh~t
but this one has a smashing ass and a lovely set of tits
[chorus]
and i said
bounce a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish
that’s the way we do things lad, we’re making sh~t up as we wish
the klingons and the romulans pose no threat to us
’cause if we find we’re in a bind we’ll just make some sh~t up

[interlude]
bonus verse

[verse 5]
well then they got a new show, and it’s called enterprise
and it takes place a hundred years before kirk was alive
they say that it’s a prequel or so that’s what it’s called
it’s such a bad idea you’d swear that lucas was involved
they have a vulcan female but she’s a nervous wreck
her ass is sweet as seven’s only green so what the heck
they’re in the past but klingons have those lobsters on their heads
i’m more confused than wesley crusher nude in tasha’s bed
i’m not anatomically correct

[chorus]
and i say
bounce a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish
that’s the way we do things lad, we’re making sh~t up as we wish
the klingons and the romulans they pose no threat to us
’cause if we find we’re in a bind, we’re totally screwed but never mind
we’ll pull something out of our behinds
we just make some sh~t up

- lirik lagu aurelio voltaire

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