lirik lagu ashtxnjpeg - death note
(verse 1:)
can’t i just get some love?
sometimes i want to disappear
all i really want is to be found
nyia, kyla, monique, hope y’all hear
i’ve tried everything, ohh everything
that pandora ring, to that homecoming poster, to a text saying “hi”
all i got was dismissed as days went by
i commit too fast, it’s really the issue
my own worst enemy, not even, man vs knife could defeat (me)
all along, being alone
all i got is god, parents, a few friends
and a whole lot of enemies
when i rest on the edge of the earth, do you think of me?
maybe i’m just too vulnerable, i see
maybe i have no self control, i bleed
maybe i don’t need my counselor to guide me
maybe i overthink anything and everything
maybe i don’t know how to let go
maybe i talk low cause my thoughts are grey
maybe my hair falls down a certain way
certainly i haven’t found a tunnel, only light
when i want the sun, heat in my hand
those people named ethan tran & huy ho will begging
“maybe we could work this out?”
“maybe we could smoke our lungs away?”
“maybe this hot tub will cool you down?”
sit around bonfires, talking bout bl-wj-bs with no jobs
unemployed little f-cks, none given
only earned
i know those friends of mine laughing at my voice
imagine not feeling my sorrow
just because it doesn’t sound like youngboy or quando rondo?
i stopped the tiffee memes cause that was obscene
now i don’t know the last time i was ever that mean
girls think i’m awkward
i’m in-securing my own mind
nikki laughed at me just walking normal
you better thank god i’m kind
i get used more than toilets
i tried football, i foiled
i tried being….,
but y’all wouldn’t want to know
it’d just be a chappelle scene
with nothing but a laugh track on repeat
when i write this, i hide this
from my loved ones
thinking that i’m on the suicide list
everything in red, cause it’s my favorite
it bleeds more than a sharpie
this isn’t a song, it’s just a letter to those that randomly hit play or are interested in what i have to say
you wouldn’t understand this if you were 99% sad
99% of you are careless
says one thing on snapchat about not caring about guys
one month later, he’s sucking your thighs
take that mask off, why you bother to disguise?
when i leave, i want black kids and all kids alike to know that they can be anything
you’re the commander, your brain is the galaxy, be who you are, and go far
i lashed out on my mom too many times, when she hears this, she’ll put me back in rehab for my crimes
flame pants, vans, “love everyone” tee, the team uniform
my brain is a storm fighting h-llstorms
sounds like rocket science, until it explodes
and the day it explodes
is the day i finish this thank you letter, these c-ssettes, and counting worms
give me thirteen reasons why i shouldn’t leave
(instrumental break:)
(additional vocals sampled: kid cudi)
thank you ladies and gentlemen, bye!
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